[...He's tired again. He brings a hand over his eyes. ...He hasn't been alright for weeks...between discovering that someone he thought was dead probably wasn't dead, to someone who disappeared and might have been dead, to someone being definitely dead, to someone up and disappearing. When it had gotten too much, he'd cut his connections...but a shinki can't cut the connection to his god by himself.]
I don't...like battle, Shun. [Getting better at learning to attack people feels awful, and not the same kind of awful that arises within him when he trains for too long. Shun's considering that a measure of respect isn't...comforting.]
It's...
...terrifying. [To lose himself to violence, and ruthlessness, and the certainty that he'd do anything to survive.]
no subject
[...He's tired again. He brings a hand over his eyes. ...He hasn't been alright for weeks...between discovering that someone he thought was dead probably wasn't dead, to someone who disappeared and might have been dead, to someone being definitely dead, to someone up and disappearing. When it had gotten too much, he'd cut his connections...but a shinki can't cut the connection to his god by himself.]
I don't...like battle, Shun. [Getting better at learning to attack people feels awful, and not the same kind of awful that arises within him when he trains for too long. Shun's considering that a measure of respect isn't...comforting.]
It's...
...terrifying. [To lose himself to violence, and ruthlessness, and the certainty that he'd do anything to survive.]
We can't all be like you.