He didn’t know what to expect. Some kind of retort, a divine intervention, hell maybe a burst of wind and cherry blossoms everywhere since that seemed to happen so regularly around Rin while they had their meeting outside. He might not know all that much about gods and shinki, but wouldn’t it be seen as rude, disrespectful, dangerous even, to so forcefully manhandle his god? The person who owned him, branded him, who could command and change him as he saw fit. And here Sousuke was, grabbing him by the arm and all but slamming his back against the nearest door out of a spur of irritation and frustration. His heartbeat spiked in his chest, his breath momentarily caught, muscles hardening as he instinctively braced for anything that might rush against him from Rin’s reaction.
But… nothing. Only the fading echo of the other boy’s body thudding against the door and the memory of the handle rattling slightly from the impact. Sousuke narrowed his eyes and he tightened his hand around Rin’s wrist. Not enough to hurt him, but not indicating he’d be so easily shaken off. The light from the windows was cut off in the shadows, covering Rin’s body with his own and the door’s alcove in such a way it seemed to swallow him. He saw his pupils blow open wide, the way his eyes flicked upward to stare into his own. Fear? Surprise? Frustration? What… what was in his eyes?
Of course he was angry! He didn’t have any real idea what or who he was supposed to be in this world, was trying to adjust and parse through the multifaceted information that strangers had thrown at him yesterday, struggled with coming to terms about being a shinki beneath a god, and still half-reeling from the transformation earlier that all-but stripped away any lingering haze of denial he might’ve been able to throw at this damn event! All of that coupled with the emotional issues that Rin was dealing with and putting Sousuke through at the same time. He wanted to be angry with him, wanted to find it in his head to regret accepting this deal, to let go and turn away in frustration as he headed right for the door and back out onto the streets.
But he didn’t. Oh he was angry at Rin. But not because he’d claimed Sousuke as his shinki, not because he turned him into a dog, not even because he’d cried in front of him in front of the gates. He was pissed because... you keep pushing yourself and you won’t tell me why! He wanted Rin to finally snap, to finally spit out whatever it was that made him clutch at his chest or laugh in that stupid, false way. Yell at me, curse, shout why you have to force yourself to keep going! Hadn’t he already told Rin to go lie down? Hadn’t Sousuke already told him he was fine and he didn’t have to worry about him? He knew Rin wasn’t feeling well right now, was struggling with something that maybe he couldn’t tell Sousuke. Fine! Say that then! But don’t keep pretending to be okay and expect me to believe that lie!
But he didn’t. Sousuke heard the scramble of fingers on wood and the soft ‘click’ of a lock being lifted, both too fast and sudden for him to try and stop it. The door swung open and he winced as light plunged over Rin’s shoulders and smacked him right in the face. He stumbled forward as Rin shoved backwards, doing some kind of awkward dance in an attempt not to fall over and not to knock the young god to the floor. But his arm abruptly went forward and he grunted in surprise as Rin yanked him into the room. He went. Ultimately ended up in a strange half-lunge position with his hand still wrapped tight around Rin’s wrist and his body tense from the sudden whirl of action.
Stay!
Sousuke jerked upright and stared at Rin, mouth hanging open halfway in a look of surprise. The command—no, plea—rung through the air in a voice that shivered despite its intensity. The shinki’s jaw set and flexed beneath the light tan of his skin and his lips twitched just slightly, as if he wanted to bare his teeth and growl, but was doing a fair job of holding the reaction back. The same kind of feeling came from before, when he’d stood there in the wet and the sakura, watching Rin with his tears and listening to his words. Even after all that, his distrust and speculation, Rin’s emotions and the confusion that twined taut between them, his own words drifted back to his mind, as permanently imprinted on his memories as the name etched into the curve of his shoulder. Fine. I’ll stay. He’d said that… hadn’t he.
A small part of him, detached from all the rest of this, was a little piqued that Rin would give that kind of command after turning Sousuke into a dog…
… Just stay.
And there it came again. Sousuke narrowed his eyes, lips pressing into a disappointed and irritated pout. This guy… honestly. And he wasn’t getting an answer to his demand either. Only another plea for him to stay. A plea, order, request, command… that he was apparently going along with. Sousuke released Rin’s wrist, letting their arms fall apart. His expression didn’t change, still frustrated. Finally, with a sharp “che-” of annoyance, Sousuke turned away from the other boy and headed towards the window. That icy feeling in Rin’s chest relinquished some of its stab, but instead dissolved into something warmer, heavy, and turbulent. Distanced. He didn’t stop until he was standing in front of the window and leaned his marked shoulder against the sill. Teal eyes glared out into the sakura grove covering the landscape around the castle and he crossed his arms over his chest, his broad shoulders and the expanse of his back blocking out the other boy by the door
“Maybe you can’t tell me what’s bothering you. Or you won’t. I don’t know.” He refused to look at Rin, focused on the trees outside so he didn’t risk the chance of seeing him in the reflection of the glass. “But stop pretending you’re fine around me. I know you’re not.” Strange to think this was their relationship after deciding to accept one another as god and shinki. This was his partner from now on… Yeah well no one said it was going to be instantaneously best friends. “Go lie down and rest.”
The silent undercurrent of his tone and the abrasiveness of his position conveyed the other comment fairly easily: I’m not talking to you anymore for now.
no subject
But… nothing. Only the fading echo of the other boy’s body thudding against the door and the memory of the handle rattling slightly from the impact. Sousuke narrowed his eyes and he tightened his hand around Rin’s wrist. Not enough to hurt him, but not indicating he’d be so easily shaken off. The light from the windows was cut off in the shadows, covering Rin’s body with his own and the door’s alcove in such a way it seemed to swallow him. He saw his pupils blow open wide, the way his eyes flicked upward to stare into his own. Fear? Surprise? Frustration? What… what was in his eyes?
Of course he was angry! He didn’t have any real idea what or who he was supposed to be in this world, was trying to adjust and parse through the multifaceted information that strangers had thrown at him yesterday, struggled with coming to terms about being a shinki beneath a god, and still half-reeling from the transformation earlier that all-but stripped away any lingering haze of denial he might’ve been able to throw at this damn event! All of that coupled with the emotional issues that Rin was dealing with and putting Sousuke through at the same time. He wanted to be angry with him, wanted to find it in his head to regret accepting this deal, to let go and turn away in frustration as he headed right for the door and back out onto the streets.
But he didn’t. Oh he was angry at Rin. But not because he’d claimed Sousuke as his shinki, not because he turned him into a dog, not even because he’d cried in front of him in front of the gates. He was pissed because... you keep pushing yourself and you won’t tell me why! He wanted Rin to finally snap, to finally spit out whatever it was that made him clutch at his chest or laugh in that stupid, false way. Yell at me, curse, shout why you have to force yourself to keep going! Hadn’t he already told Rin to go lie down? Hadn’t Sousuke already told him he was fine and he didn’t have to worry about him? He knew Rin wasn’t feeling well right now, was struggling with something that maybe he couldn’t tell Sousuke. Fine! Say that then! But don’t keep pretending to be okay and expect me to believe that lie!
But he didn’t. Sousuke heard the scramble of fingers on wood and the soft ‘click’ of a lock being lifted, both too fast and sudden for him to try and stop it. The door swung open and he winced as light plunged over Rin’s shoulders and smacked him right in the face. He stumbled forward as Rin shoved backwards, doing some kind of awkward dance in an attempt not to fall over and not to knock the young god to the floor. But his arm abruptly went forward and he grunted in surprise as Rin yanked him into the room. He went. Ultimately ended up in a strange half-lunge position with his hand still wrapped tight around Rin’s wrist and his body tense from the sudden whirl of action.
Stay!
Sousuke jerked upright and stared at Rin, mouth hanging open halfway in a look of surprise. The command—no, plea—rung through the air in a voice that shivered despite its intensity. The shinki’s jaw set and flexed beneath the light tan of his skin and his lips twitched just slightly, as if he wanted to bare his teeth and growl, but was doing a fair job of holding the reaction back. The same kind of feeling came from before, when he’d stood there in the wet and the sakura, watching Rin with his tears and listening to his words. Even after all that, his distrust and speculation, Rin’s emotions and the confusion that twined taut between them, his own words drifted back to his mind, as permanently imprinted on his memories as the name etched into the curve of his shoulder. Fine. I’ll stay. He’d said that… hadn’t he.
A small part of him, detached from all the rest of this, was a little piqued that Rin would give that kind of command after turning Sousuke into a dog…
… Just stay.
And there it came again. Sousuke narrowed his eyes, lips pressing into a disappointed and irritated pout. This guy… honestly. And he wasn’t getting an answer to his demand either. Only another plea for him to stay. A plea, order, request, command… that he was apparently going along with. Sousuke released Rin’s wrist, letting their arms fall apart. His expression didn’t change, still frustrated. Finally, with a sharp “che-” of annoyance, Sousuke turned away from the other boy and headed towards the window. That icy feeling in Rin’s chest relinquished some of its stab, but instead dissolved into something warmer, heavy, and turbulent. Distanced. He didn’t stop until he was standing in front of the window and leaned his marked shoulder against the sill. Teal eyes glared out into the sakura grove covering the landscape around the castle and he crossed his arms over his chest, his broad shoulders and the expanse of his back blocking out the other boy by the door
“Maybe you can’t tell me what’s bothering you. Or you won’t. I don’t know.” He refused to look at Rin, focused on the trees outside so he didn’t risk the chance of seeing him in the reflection of the glass. “But stop pretending you’re fine around me. I know you’re not.” Strange to think this was their relationship after deciding to accept one another as god and shinki. This was his partner from now on… Yeah well no one said it was going to be instantaneously best friends. “Go lie down and rest.”
The silent undercurrent of his tone and the abrasiveness of his position conveyed the other comment fairly easily: I’m not talking to you anymore for now.