thenearshore | There's nothing that I'd take back

Entry tags:

There's nothing that I'd take back

Who: Sanae and ~~Meng Lu~~ Lu Meng
What: Prayer 7
Where: The Near Shore
When: Night-time, May 22nd

"For some reason, the neighborhood just won't stop getting loud every night. It looks like there's something more than loud people around."

[It looks like it wasn't just pigeons that were keeping the children up at night. When Lu Meng and Sanae return to the neighbourhood for a second round of investigations, the street lights immediately begin to flicker. The playground where they'd held their night-time vigil is cast sharply in the blinking light, long, distorted shadows that cut starkly across the ground flickering in time with the lights.

And for all the complaints of noisy nights, a heavy silence has settled upon the area instead. No buzzing of electric lights, no crickets, not even a rustle of the leaves, even as the air feels cool upon their skin.

Lu Meng looks about them warily, pulling out his phone to type a quick message to Sanae but not sending it out, for fear that any sound will alert any hostile presence. Instead, he holds it out to her so that she can read the message on the screen.]

Should we flush out the ayakashi? Or wait for them to attack?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

We flush them out. [ She says, her voice low but firm.

It's not that she's been moody lately, it's just that she's been rather distant. Considering she just had just lost a friend, it shouldn't be too surprising to Lu Meng. Yes, yes, she knows she's promised to talk to him about matters, but it simply hasn't been the right time or place, and she's needed time to work through her feelings herself. ] Genki.

[ Going on a hunt for ayakashi is a nice distraction. ]

Understood.

[And for his part, he doesn't try to cover that distance between them. In fact, if he's feeling unhappy, upset, disappointed...well, he's doing a good job to cover up those emotions because Sanae wouldn't have gotten anything from him. There's not even a speck of guilt at having been the blade that had severed a friendship.

A flash of light, and she'll have a flip-phone in her hand. But that bit of light had been enough to stir up and provoke their intended targets. In the darkness, an eye suddenly blinks at them, hoovering just above the swing set. It is joined by another, another and another, spreading from the swing and circling the both of them.

Once they've been completely surrounded, the chattering begins. It starts softly, before exploding into a cacophony of household neighbourhood noises, all blended together, loud and chaotic. Lu Meng clasps his hands over his ears, the noise pounding into his head. He's barely able to shout out a warning.]

My...my lady! Be careful!!

[ She immediately pockets him, taking out her gohei instead. Red lightening gathers around the tool as she prepares for an attack. ] They're so-- loud!

[ She doesn't mean to shout, and she isn't shouting at him either. It's just that if she didn't shout, she wouldn't even be able to hear herself! ] Hey, you ayakashi-- don't you know that some people are trying to sleep?!

[ The ayakashi don't seem to care. Now that they have her surrounded, they all pounce in towards her at once. It's difficult to concentrate when there is so much noise, but luckily she's prepared her attack. She unleashes the lightening around her, and like a bubble given too much energy it expands and disperses, chaotically whipping at the ayakashi that fly towards her. ]

[But for every ayakashi she destroys, another appears to attack her.]

There's a horde of them--

[Or is there? One of her lightning strips cuts through what looks to be another ayakashi...yet there's no burst of white light that normally accompanies a Rend.]

There's something not right with these ayakashi! Not all of them are being rended!

[ Does she actually have to think about a strategy here? Dammit, why can't all ayakashi assignments be, ya know, about slashing and dashing!! ] Why--

[ There are a lot of them, flying at her from every direction.

It's a good thing she comes from a canon centered around bullet hell. This fight is almost nostalgic. ] Aren't they-- [ Dodge dodge dodge. ] being exorcised--?!

[ More dodging! ]

I don't know.

[He's watching carefully when one of her lightning bolt hits the vague shape of the ayakashi...and nothing. The bolt goes through the eyes like there was nothing there.]

Your attacks are connecting, but it's almost as if they're not hurting the ayakashi at all--

[But another flash of lightning reveals that the ground is scorched by the electricity.] --but your lightning has been on-point. In fact, they're piercing through the ayakashi.

---Through the ayakashi? [ She repeats. That's a major clue. ] Then they're like illusions!

[ How insulting! Sanae uses wind to keep the majority of them at bay. If she needs to actually think, she needs to focus on one thing at a time. Even if they are fake, she's not going to wait around and see if they would hurt if they hit her. ] We have to find the main one.

And all these shadows aren't helping either. I can only see eyes everywhere.

[For all they know, the ayakashi could be a shapeless blob with bouncing eyes decorating its skin. Everytime Lu Meng tries to focus on one, it's as if he's staring at a blur. And all this noise isn't helping! It's getting harder and harder to focus.]

We may not be able to pick out the real ayakashi with just our eyes...but what would help is if we properly light up this playground.

That won't be a problem--

[ Time for some stars.

With a wave of her gohei, multiple bright, white stars shimmer as they descend onto the playground, illuminating the area. Flares extend out of their spherical forms like tendrils, shooting out at the ayakashi's false eyes. It'll keep their tiny opponents busy, and give her time to look around the area. ]

[Once the area is illuminated, the ayakashi are revealed to be nothing but shadows that flicker in the light, their bodies fuzzy with the only realistic part of them being the eyes.

Well, almost all the ayakashi.

Perched upon the slide is the clear outline of a purple body trying its best to huddle and keep out of sight.]

My lady! Over there, at the slide!!

[ Sanae turns to where he indicates. ] Finally the mastermind reveals itself...!

[ Okay, no, that's putting it dramatically. But Sanae continues, raising her gohei. ] You who would desecrate the Land of th----

[ THONK

A shadow ayakashi has flown right at the back of her head. As it turns out, those tiny eyes pack a punch! Normally Sanae would be more aware, but all of the chattering and giggling, loud and unforgiving, have caused her to be a lot more susceptible.

She topples forward, landing on the ground in front of the so-called "mastermind" ayakashi. ] Oof....

[Sensing an opening, the mastermind launches an attack!! A giant maw with rows and rows of sharp teeth stretches impossibly wide, hoping to snap around her neck for a snack--]

Issen!

[--only for a boundary to cut across the space between god and ayakashi. Razor sharp, the line completely slice off the ayakashi's head instead. Such is the ferocity of Sanae's shinki, that any who dare to try and hurt her will have to face his wrath.

But the ayakashi is not dead. Sure its head goes flying past her, landing somewhere behind. But the ayakashi not only takes on a lizard-like form: as the headless body scuttles away in panic, new skin and muscle are bulging out from the stump, the beginnings of a new head.

For now, Lu Meng switches his focus from the hunt to his god.]

Lady Kochiya! Are you alright?

I-- I'm fine, I'm fine! [ She says, standing up and rubbing the spot where the tiny ayakashi hit her.

Uuuuugh how embarrassing. ]

[ But Lu Meng has made up for her mistake, and now it's time to bring this to an end while the ayakahshi still attempts to regenerate. ] Right. Let's finish this...!

[ The enchantment returns, spoken easily from her lips as if the very spell is inherent to her being. She points her gohei at the ayakashi just as it regenerates the rest of its body from the stump of its head.

And when the incantation is finished, she shouts above all of the noise. ] ---Rend...! [ The spell cuts cleanly through the air and chaos. There's a flash of light, and the ayakashi disperses. ]

[The instant the ayakashi is exorcised, the other ayakashi illusions vanish as well. The noise immediately disappears, as if sucked away by an invisible force.

All except for some distant, fuzzy chatter, coming from some bushes. The ayakashi's severed head is there, flopping about uselessly. As Sanae approaches, the chatter takes on two defined voices, distorted but still recognizable as hers and her shinki, interspersed with the occasional creak of the swing set.

As if to remind her of a promise she made just a few days ago.]

[ It's sickening in a way, to know that a private conversation had been overhead by a creature so corrupt. The head begins to dissolve into nothing as the rend is complete, leaving behind nothing but the soft indent of gravel where it once sat. The promise, while made in all sincerity, is a guilty thorn in her side. She knows she must talk to him, but she doesn't know if now's the appropriate time when she still feel hurt.

But to continue that analogy of the thorn in her side, if she were simply to ignore it, it could fester and cause greater damage. No negative topic is easy, but she knows she must confront it head-on. ] Lu Meng.

[ She takes him out of her pocket, releasing him back to his real form. ] ....Before we go, there's something I want to ask you about.

[She would be able to feel her shinki's disgust, as if too is similarly repulsed by the ayakashi having eavesdropped on such a private conversation between them.

He's glad it's dead.

In another burst of light, he assumes his human form in front of her.]

Yes, my lady.

[ There's no easy way to talk about this, and he'll see her obvious discomfort upon her expression. ] I've... promised to be more open with myself, and what I'm feeling. [ To not keep her feelings to herself. ]

....You've seen that Zero has returned. [ She presents the topic first, so he might know what sort of conversation this might be. ] He and I talked for a little, but in the end, he-- [ Her voice shakes for a moment, but she takes a steadying breath. ]

He said he would stay away from me. That he maid a promise that he would.

[ She knows it's Lu Meng who made him promise as much. But she wants to give Lu Meng a chance to say something about it, to give his reasoning. A pained thought occurs to her-- if she didn't bring this up, would Lu Meng have told her at all? She's felt no blight, no guilt for him, so clearly he feels it's justified. But to Sanae, this hurts. ]

Yes. I asked him to keep his distance from you, and he promised me that he would.

[Straight to business it is.]

I knew you took your inability to bring him back from that feral state poorly. And I was concerned about the lengths you would go to save him.

I guessed that Zero told you. I didn't bring it up that day itself because you were upset, and I wanted to give you the time and space to sort out your emotions.

If you wish to punish me for acting without your permission, then I'll accept whatever you see fit. But I stand by my decision to prioritize your safety.

[ After living with him for just this amount of him, she knows he can be quite obstinate. And she knows this isn't something that will change his opinion about either. But it still bothers her-- no. It upsets her, that he took it this far. Oh, but she's upset at a lot of things, at herself for not being stronger, at not being a better friend to Zero, at how Zero agreed to stay away from her. And-- and maybe it's for the best then, that he did agree. Maybe that she was that terrible of a friend to him in the end! ]

--He isn't an animal anymore! He says that something like that won't happen again...!

[ During the fight she was only shouting to be heart. Now she's actually shouting at him. The worst thing about it is that she knows she's becoming emotional, but she isn't doing anything to stop it because the wound is that fresh. It also doesn't help with how she'd like to seem more mature around him.

It's like he's the protective yet ultimately right father, forbidding his daughter to have friends with a bad crowd. And she's just the tearful child, sore and hurt and feeling miserable because of it. ]

I respectfully disagree.

[And he faces her emotional outbursts with a steely calm.]

The magic that has brought him back as a god could one day decide to revoke his divinity. Or perhaps he may die and be reincarnated, this time without the memory of his condition.

And I know that if he should fall again, you would blame yourself even harder for failing him as a friend. I don't believe that his situation is hopeless. I have faith that you'll figure out a way to break this curse upon him.

But I don't want you to endanger or berate yourself. You have more than just Zero to look after.

[ True, she can feel his emotions. But he'll also clearly be able to see her frustration in return. She can't meet his gaze, feeling a tension wind up in her chest.

She's never lost a friend, not like-- not like this. She's never had someone say that they would keep away from her. Zero hardly put up a fight-- in fact, he, too, was arguing to stay away. Was their friendship so weak? Was it just her hope that was misplaced...? ] ...I'm not going to break his curse. Ever.

[ She says, her voice cracking. ] He wants me to stay away, too. He agrees with you. [ Lu Meng must be happy about that, she thinks bitterly. ]

Edited 2016-12-12 04:34 (UTC)

I don't derive any joy from this. It's been an entirely unpleasant event, and if there's one thing I do regret, is that it's causing you this grief.

I'm sorry for you and Zero. But you can still consult the other gods for help, or you could build your followers till you have enough power to properly banish that side of him for good.

That man agreed to keep his distance not to break his ties with you. He did it because he is your friend. And I believe that your friendship with him is only over if you think it is.

[ ....Ah, but it sure sounded like all ties would be cut off from her conversation with him. She wouldn't have been satisfied if they had to keep their distance and only interact via text or calls or the BBS, but it still would have been better than completely breaking apart a friendship. Which is what Sanae believes this to be. ] That's--... that's a weird idea of friendship, to stay away from someone who is your friend.

[ Her anger has partly left her, and she lowers her gaze, feeling her vision blurring. ] Do you... truly think that this is for the best?

[ Of course he does. And apparently, Zero agrees too. So maybe she's the one who is wrong. The one has to let this go, and resign herself to having lost a friend. For failing him. Maybe she's the unreasonable one, the one who can't see danger where it is, who really doesn't know what's best for her or what will make her happy.

(She sure doesn't feel happy right now, though.) ]

[Finally, finally she'll feel some emotion from him. It's sadness, that she has to go through this tough lesson. But he is no less firm, even if his expression softens.

A white handkerchief will appear in her vision.]

Being a friend is more than just being around someone. It means doing what's best for a person, even if it hurts. That man Zero understood that, even though I'm sure he wanted your companionship.

I think it works as a temporary solution until he's cured. When that happens will be up to him...and to you.

[ She blinks quickly, almost about to refuse the handkerchief, but a few escape and land upon the tissue. That shouldn't be surprising to Lu Meng, as he knows how emotional she can become. She sniffs, taking the handkerchief to pad at her eyes. ] ...Doing what's best...

[ Sanae repeats softly. ] Doing what's best... means leaving him alone, and staying away. [ She says, looking up at him now. ] Doing what's best means that he'll be happy-- won't he? That I'm honoring the promise between the two of you, by keeping away. And staying safe. Doing what's best is--

[ She shuts her eyes tightly, hanging her head. Ah, it seems she can't look at the silver lining just yet. It's too soon. But at the very least, she understands his rationale. ] Let's go home, Lu Meng...

[For a moment it looks like he wants to say something else. His hand raises, almost as if he wanted to touch her shoulder...but it then falls to the side, and Lu Meng takes a step back from her.

Feelings of sadness, of (finally) guilt, though it's not because of what he'd done. Rather, there's a frustration bubbling in him, because the last thing he wants is to see her tears. And the fact that he can do nothing to help, seeing as he's the cause of it all--]

Alright, my lady.

[It's not like he can talk about how he feels right now. Not when his god is grieving the lost of a friendship. Instead, all he can do is try to rationalise these emotions, try to diffuse them before he upsets her further.

But she should know, despite the stoic mask he's wearing, that he's sorry he can't help her deal with this sorrow.]

[ Two steps forward, another step back. Their relationship has been a rocky one, ever since the beginning. And while she can and will bounce back from this sorrow, this is the deepest she's been hurt by anything. Yes, this hurts more than when she was forced to kill Zero. More than when she had felt his blight, after she had dismissed Lu Meng before.

But despite this, she reaches out to hold his sleeve. And within the next moment, she teleports them back to her temple. ] I suppose... thank you for looking out for my safety, Lu Meng. [ It's a safety she can't quite appreciate when it means losing a friend. At least not yet She reminds herself that he means well. And that he probably knows better than her. Maybe it's just her immaturity that makes her blind to how he sees it.

Yes, she'll simply tell herself that. ] You're such a good shinki, for doing so.

[A good shinki, yes. But a good friend? It seems these days, their relationship has definitely entered choppy waters.

...strange that he should feel this bad. After all his advice, he's still affected by this new argument between them.

But although he promised her that he'd be more open, this isn't the time and place for him to share his own sadness. That would be just be selfish. All he can do is salute her.]

I don't deserve that praise now, my lady. But thank you, for taking my feelings into account. You are too good to me.

Mm... [ She concludes, releasing his sleeve. It seems he has something more to say, but perhaps now isn't the time.

But she doesn't move away just yet. She offers her hand to him, as well as a tiny smile. He knows what this means. A friendship handshake is always due after a prayer, and their argument doesn't change that fact. ]

Edited 2016-12-12 06:54 (UTC)

[Oh. Lu Meng looks at her extended hand, hesitating for a moment. Are they performing their handshake because it's customary, or is she trying to affirm their friendship?

It didn't feel right to him to perform the necessary motions. And although he's again spot on with each action, no amount of sharp attention to each clap and snap is going to replace sincerity and enthusiasm.

When it's over, his hands linger on hers, and a strange expression flickers across his face. But again he says nothing, and instead only draws his hands away.]

Sleep well, my lady. I'll prepare breakfast for you and your guest tomorrow morning.

[ That strange emotion that appears for all but an instant grabs her attention, but she can't identify it any easier than he can. But that mysterious emotion will remain a mystery, as he's already pulled away his hand from hers. ]

Mm. [ She nods, stepping back. They've another guest in the temple now, and she should make herself look more presentable before ensuring that he's alright. ] ...Have a good night, Lu Meng.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

There's nothing that I'd take back

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

1/2

no subject

no subject

1/2

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject