[The door opens, and Hakkai whirls around from the window. 'Welcome home' -- panic surges up in him, choking and hot, and he knows she must feel it too as he stares wild-eyed at her reserved expression.
No. His voice is stretched thin with the effort of keeping it level.]
Yuri, you have to let me go.
[He can't do this. He'll find someone else. Inflict himself on someone else. When he asks them first, at least he can tell himself that they understood; it's not, of course, a comfort, but it's something he can think to patch over the guilt.
And he can't think about his guilt right now; his hand flies up to the back of his neck, as if he can feel blight. There is no mirror in the room. He doesn't know if he's already stung her with his fear and anger, or only roused her from her bed with them.]
no subject
No. His voice is stretched thin with the effort of keeping it level.]
Yuri, you have to let me go.
[He can't do this. He'll find someone else. Inflict himself on someone else. When he asks them first, at least he can tell himself that they understood; it's not, of course, a comfort, but it's something he can think to patch over the guilt.
And he can't think about his guilt right now; his hand flies up to the back of his neck, as if he can feel blight. There is no mirror in the room. He doesn't know if he's already stung her with his fear and anger, or only roused her from her bed with them.]