I'm afraid you're right. [He breathes out, not quite a sigh, and closes his eyes again for a few seconds before straightening up away from the wall.]

I would rather not hurt you, Yuri, but I'm -- still a shinki. I can't help that, it seems.

[Letting himself fall into guilt and despair would be very easy. The trouble, after all of this, is holding it off: but he's not ready to give up. It's a good reason for him to have a god. When he might be tempted to think of losing himself to blight as a relief instead of a threat, there is Yuri's health to think of, now, too. It's something to fall back on when his own pride isn't quite enough.]

There is one thing I want you to promise me, if I'm going to stay.

[There's one concern that's more practical than his worries about his feelings, and the poison they inflict on both himself and his goddess.]

If I'm found to be a traitor against the Heavens, for any reason, renounce me at once.

[He won't stop looking, and -- if he finds anything -- acting on it may be a suicide mission. That won't stop him. But he'd rather not bring her down with him when he goes.]