Add [ 𝙼𝚊𝚍 𝙿𝚊𝚛𝚊𝚍𝚘𝚡 ] (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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thenearshore2017-02-20 10:24 pm
subtract) wrote in thenearshore2017-02-20 10:24 pm
Entry tags:
[CLOSED]
Who: Add & Jakob
Where: The Near Shore
When: June 17th
What: Prayer #18
Warnings: Feels.
Sora had at least convinced Add to try apologizing to Jakob over leaving him to another god, but the act of apologizing for a broken leg plus three weeks of cold silence would be... difficult. He's still not even sure where to start, what to say, what to bring... but as tempting as it is to keep putting it off, what ends up happening is the complete opposite. It's been quite some time since they've last received a prayer, after all.
The trip to the Near Shore is as awkward as he expects, though he at least spares Jakob enough words to tell him where they're going. And it'd be so, so easy to just tack on a by the way, I'm sorry for being such an ass, but that might come off as too apathetic, and the more he thinks about it the more nervous he gets, like what if Jakob is so upset he really doesn't accept Add's apology and he's only serving him now because he has to, or—
Ugh, he really needs to get this over with before it drives him crazy.
He fakes a cough, trying desperately to think of some way to break the ice. Just say something, damnit. Say anything.
"The... tea you left the other day was... nice." He didn't drink it. It's still sitting on his desk. Maybe Jakob didn't notice and this won't be the worst attempt at small talk ever.
Where: The Near Shore
When: June 17th
What: Prayer #18
Warnings: Feels.
Sora had at least convinced Add to try apologizing to Jakob over leaving him to another god, but the act of apologizing for a broken leg plus three weeks of cold silence would be... difficult. He's still not even sure where to start, what to say, what to bring... but as tempting as it is to keep putting it off, what ends up happening is the complete opposite. It's been quite some time since they've last received a prayer, after all.
The trip to the Near Shore is as awkward as he expects, though he at least spares Jakob enough words to tell him where they're going. And it'd be so, so easy to just tack on a by the way, I'm sorry for being such an ass, but that might come off as too apathetic, and the more he thinks about it the more nervous he gets, like what if Jakob is so upset he really doesn't accept Add's apology and he's only serving him now because he has to, or—
Ugh, he really needs to get this over with before it drives him crazy.
He fakes a cough, trying desperately to think of some way to break the ice. Just say something, damnit. Say anything.
"The... tea you left the other day was... nice." He didn't drink it. It's still sitting on his desk. Maybe Jakob didn't notice and this won't be the worst attempt at small talk ever.
no subject
"I don't understand you at all," he replies, and in a wry voice he adds, "are you sure you're not going to regret that decision? You might end up with more than you bargained for, kuku."
But if it's a mess he really wants, who would Add be to refuse?
"...Well, it doesn't really matter, does it? You can change your mind whenever you want." He's mostly just mumbling that to himself, but it is true. Jakob can always change his mind, Add isn't forcing him to stay or holding him back. This is... acceptable. He can live with this.
If Jakob is really choosing to stay, though, that still leaves one more problem he needs to address. He finally brings a hand up to rub at his eyes, attempting to pathetically stifle his sniffling before turning around to face his shinki again. The black in his eyes can hide some of the redness, at least.
"There are mistakes I've made in the past that I don't want to repeat. If you're to remain as my shinki, you need to be able to stop me if that happens. No matter what."
no subject
When Jakob thinks about it he knows that there’s no stopping him from leaving Add to, say, join the other Roxas instead. But that would mean failing yet another master, and he’s sure he wouldn’t be able to take something like that again.
At least Add hasn’t decided that his shinki has failed him. At least Add is still willing to keep him on despite his weaknesses, despite his desperate efforts to destroy the bodies of their former comrades. Jakob really can’t hope for much, in the end.
He scoffs, “You’ll have to give me far more credit than that.” And is he…crying? He’s crying, isn’t he? Or…sobbing, at the very least. Argh. “But you know that I would do anything I can to be of service to you.”
no subject
"It's not something you're capable of as you are now. That's why I broke your leg before." He frowns, still feeling a bit sheepish about the whole thing. He already apologized, but lashing out like that could've ended a lot worse than it did. He can't even say that kind of behaviour is unlike him, though...
"You need a method to better defend yourself against my distortions," he continues, finding himself gradually become more comfortable now that they're away from the topic of feelings and Jakob leaving him. "Like a device that can project a barrier, perhaps... I'll have to make something for you. That way if I'm acting... unusual at all, you'll be able to intervene with a higher degree of safety."
... He's still not sure if he wants to get into why he might act unusual, even if that's kind of a crucial piece of information for preventative measures. But if he told Jakob the truth, he'd probably make a huge fuss over it. Better to just leave those details out and try not to let things get too out of control. That should be fine, right?
no subject
“I will master any task you set of me, of course.” That goes without saying, but a little reminder never hurt anyone, right? Jakob’s still reeling from his weakness at the zombie incident himself. “However, this…intervention you’re suggesting…” He hesitates, before venturing, “Will it guarantee your safety?”
Despite all his efforts to appear stern, there’s a chink in his expression once more, a pleading look in his eyes, already haunted by the extremes Add would go through to attempt any one thing. Or avoid his problems outright.
no subject
Double dead. Close enough. The sentiment is the same, even if he'd rather his shinki look out for himself. Somehow he ended up using the same tactics that worked on Roxas... how does he keep ending up with these stubborn selfless types?
"Keeping me in line used to be Roxas' job," he mutters, feeling a little wistful at the thought. How long has it been now? Already a month...? "Until we find him again, you'll have to pick up his slack. I don't trust anyone else to do the job correctly."
no subject
So he forces his expression to remain neutral if not outright submissive, as he puts his hand to his chest and gives Add a rather formal bow.
“As you command.”
no subject
Add fakes a cough, using the time Jakob is spending bent over to finish rubbing his face dry. He's still not sure how he feels about all of this, if letting Jakob stay with him is the right choice or not, but knowing that Jakob at least wants to stay has lifted his mood considerably. Even if it ends up being the wrong choice... it feels good to know that he's wanted, even in this small way.
He turns towards the temple, expecting his shinki to follow.
"Let's go home. I could... perhaps use some tea."
no subject
“Of course,” he replies, swallowing down that feeling of guilt before his god might be blighted. He takes a few steps further than Add, to properly open the door for him as a butler would, but before he does, he adds, with a sigh:
“And I’m sorry for implying that I would serve you anything other than the finest brew.” You had to go and make him feel bad for that sewage water quip earlier damn you damn you damn you—
“I will do my best to behave myself from now on.”
no subject
"Oh? I thought that was an honest confession before. In that case I'll consider not throwing it out the window this time, kekeke."
It's good to have things back to normal.
no subject
“Why you—”