[open] then i'll raise you like a phoenix

[revolutionfalcon]

Who: Shun and you!
When: August 18th-19th
Where: Various Far Shore areas
What: An extremely unfortunate spider lily encounter...
Warnings: PTSD (including flashbacks, both visual and auditory)

[A: August 18th, Day]

[The spider lilies have been around for a little while now, and Shun's largely been ignoring them. He knows Ren likes those kinds of flowers, but he must have seen them himself by now, and other than being a distracting shade of red, they're not really bothering Shun any just by existing.

It's sheer luck it takes him this long to get close enough to them to hear. Just walking by them doesn't do it, but there's the rustle of something small in a patch of them as he passes, and Shun pauses as the motion catches his eye. It might be a stray spirit that didn't get caught up in the mass exodus from the other day, but it could be something else, and Shun doesn't hesitate any longer before he leans down to investigate.

And when his head comes within about a foot of the blossoms, a cacophony of screaming breaks out in his head - thousands of people, and millions more he can't hear beyond that.

For a fleeting moment, he thinks it's a flashback, and the images that break through to the forefront of his mind at the sound don't help at all. He recognises the sounds, remembers that day all too well, and what the flowers are causing and what his own mind is supplementing it with start to blur to the point of indistinguishable.

Anyone in the vicinity may notice the unnatural, instinctive manner of his movements as he backs away from the flower patch. It doesn't quite seem like he's aware of where he's going or where he wants to be other than not here, and what to him is a comforting change of the sound under his feet indicating progress will be to others him darting halfway across a nearby bridge before stopping rather abruptly in the shadow of a small, covered viewing area.

He's still not fully aware of his surroundings as he winds an arm around one of the support posts and simply drops into a protective crouch at the base of it, fingers trying to dig into the wood, but as absent as he is, the sound of approach still puts him on alert. It takes perhaps a little longer than usual for his attention to snap to the sound of approaching footsteps. Long enough that it's likely easily visible he's shivering and pale, even as his eyes narrow and he grits his teeth in a characteristic attempt to push through it.]

What are you looking at? [It's ground out, and it's definitely not his proudest attempt at trying to drive people off.]

--

[B: August 19th, Morning]

[He doesn't sleep well that night. It's just a one-off nightmare, or so he hopes, but it's as bad as the ones that cycle back around every few months and keep him awake for days on end, so he's not holding out too much hope. He is, however, doing his level best to distract himself with whatever means he can.

Unfortunately, he's found enclosed spaces like his usual training area only really serve to make things worse on the front of his memories. It means he's dragged a punching bag outside with considerable reluctance, set up a little behind his temple garden so it's not as easy to spot for people coming to his front door. Not that it's not easy to spot overall, though - his temple hill is still surrounded by open plain on all sides, and even with the hill and garden blocking two of those, that's plenty of approach visibility.

The sound might catch attention first, though; the heavy, repetitive thudding of a sandbag taking a rapid and considerable beating. Shun doesn't really care how exhausted or exerted he might end up looking - right now, he just wants to forget, or at least take out his frustrations, and it's pretty obvious he's doing just that. His attacks on the bag are focused and brutal, and they only get harder and faster until he finally lets out a frustrated yell and drives a fist into the bag hard enough that the clip outright breaks and the bag flies for a short distance before thudding bonelessly into the grass.

Straightening up, Shun finally starts breathing again, the efforts heavy and laboured. His knuckles are bright red and starting to crack from lack of protective covering, but he doesn't seem to particularly care about that.]

Comments

B

[blizzardrock]

[He'd be incredibly unobservant if he didn't notice the noise, but for a while he just watches from inside the door. Frustration is something that one has to take on alone...]

[What he in fact didn't notice, being a non-fighter, was that Shun wasn't wearing protective gloves, but the flash of red he spots when Shun sends the bag flying gets his brain thinking of that in a hurry, and he dithers for a second before heading inside.]

[And then back out with a first-aid kit, slung over his shoulder like he wasn't watching carefully, honest.] ...Shun.

[revolutionfalcon]

[It's probably telling of itself that Shun didn't notice him watching - he's not in the habit of missing details like that, but today seems to be different for whatever reason. On the other hand, it'll be obvious once Fubuki gets closer that this isn't one of his instances of several days without sleep, since he's lacking the heavier lines and shadows he gets under his eyes from that.

When Fubuki approaches with the kit, Shun does notice him a lot more easily, and he looks from the container back to Fubuki with narrowed eyes.]

You're overreacting. [He does have the knuckles on one hand covered by the other right now, but that's more stopping himself from just trying to put the bag back up and going straight back into it.]

[blizzardrock]

[He looks pointedly at Shun's knuckles.]

[Continuing through bleeding sounds excessive to him, but...he's not sure he should be using that as the crux of the problem here. For one thing, he's never been able to stop Shun...]

It'll be here, then. [He puts the kit down. And then sits down next to it.]

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun just shoots a look right back, because he knows Fubuki must've noticed those to have brought the first-aid kit out. Still, he's not too interested in opening up about why he's in this kind of mood yet.

Which is why Fubuki seemingly making himself comfortable just gets a rather flat, exasperated look. There's something dull and dead about Shun's countenance today regardless, but this just accentuates the look.]

Sit there too long and I'll make you join in. [It's a somewhat half-assed threat, but it's very difficult to pick that from his tone.]

A, because they obviously run into each other a lot on that day

[lostinshadows]

[He was still reeling from Allen leaving when he took notice of someone running across a bridge. It only clicked just a second later than the person he saw was Shun.

Both curiosity and worry has him following after the god.

As he slows down, he stills upon seeing the condition he's in. This is the first time he's seen Shun like this, but despite it, he recognizes the signs of someone who's been traumatized - a haunted past that Lavi can sort of understand and be familiar with. The defensive gesture only makes Lavi frown a bit.]

...Sitting down might help you better.

i'm just imagining shun leaving from the hammer encounter and then FIVE MIINUTES LATER...

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun just watches Lavi for a few moments after he says that, as if still hoping he might go away. There is some kind of point there, though, and Shun reluctantly shifts his weight a bit so that he's sitting rather than crouching. He still has his knees up in front of him - it's like he's trying to make as small a target as possible.]

It doesn't really make a difference. [His words are still a little clipped, but at least he's talking in a way that isn't just about openly hostile. His ears are still ringing, and with a frustrated hiss, he raises his free hand to one side of his head.] It hasn't been this clear in a long time.

[It's more of a murmur to himself - under normal circumstances, he probably wouldn't have said it, but he's still a little out of it. While he never has trouble remembering those screams, there was the dampening of years between now and that day. But this sounds as fresh as the day he first heard it.]

IT CAN HAPPEN

[lostinshadows]

[He patiently waits for Shun to actually sit, not once moving from his place. In a way, it feels as if he's approaching a startled and cornered animal - one wrong move and the other might lash out at him in defensive.

When Shun finally does, Lavi sits down as well, not once moving closer.]

What isn't clear?

[Lavi asks this carefully, having heard the murmur despite how quiet it was. Then again, if it's just the two of them, he's likely to catch things easier than if they were involved in a crowd.

He isn't ignorant to how small Shun seems to try to make himself, the protective gesture enough that it has Lavi leaning back a bit so that it doesn't feel like he's trying to crowd the god.]

a very srs timeline

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun doesn't take his eyes off Lavi while he moves, which is a mark of how apt the cornered animal comparison is. If it was anyone he didn't know as well, lashing out and bolting would already be tempting.

However, his attention slips at that question, and he looks to one side with a slight "tch" sound.]

The screaming-- [Even from just those two words, several things may become clear. The first, that he says it as if it should be obvious. The second, that the phrasing implies this is a specific, known instance of screaming, as opposed to something general. And the third, that he immediately cuts himself off with a tightened jaw once he realises what he just admitted in his absence of mind.]

Never mind. [He shakes his head, half turning it away, but with his gaze still on Lavi in case he moves again.]

B

[welcome_home]

[ Nanako had been winging overhead when the steady impact against the punching bag had piqued her curiosity and redirected her course to approach the familiar location of Shun's temple. She arrives just in time to see the bag go flying some distance away and she descends with an impressed look on her face. ]

Wow, Shun-oniichan! You're training really hard this morning.

[ ... And then she spots his hands and gasps in distress. ]

Oh no, you're hurt! [ Which has her descending all the faster now, directly towards him. ]

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun tenses as soon as he hears Nanako's voice - he doesn't really want to worry her by letting her see him in this state. But it's a bit late for that, so he merely moves to hide at least one set of knuckles as she descends.]

It's nothing major. You don't need to worry about it. [In contrast to his evident anger in attacking the sandbag, now his tone is somewhat flat. Tired, maybe, but not in the lacking sleep sense.

This is actually the first time he's encountered her on one of her fly-bys, though, so he tries to use that to distract from the subject a bit.]

It looks like you've been practicing hard yourself.

[welcome_home]

[ Nope, she's not going to be that easily distracted today, not when she can see blood dripping on the ground behind him when he tries to hide his hand from her.

She lands and marches towards him with a determined look, holding out her hand with a worried frown as she glances up at him. ]

You're bleeding. [ That makes it major, Shun! ] Let me see it, please?

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun seems surprised at that observation, and he does at least uncover his hand to check. Sure enough, just one of the cracks is deep enough to have hit blood, and he frowns slightly.]

Must've pulled it afterwards. [He's pretty sure he wasn't anything but raw in the knuckles once he'd finished up, but the fact that he'd had to curl his fist tighter to cover it up probably caused the extra damage.

It's still a reluctant motion, but he extends the hand with the blood on it towards Nanako.] I still don't think it's a problem.

[...Depending on how much healing Nanako's been doing, she may notice that his knuckles are starting to bruise under the red flush.]

A. because I obviously need more Shun threads in my inbox >.>

[darkestbefore]

[ Yona has been taking a wary care of avoiding the flowers herself after one such disastrous encounter with them that had given her the familiar voice of her father. Of Min-Soo. There were already enough reminders in this place of who and what she had lost without the aid of the local flora reminding her as well.

But on her way back from an outing with Kija, she comes across the bridge right about the same moment Shun does. Eyes widening at the frantic dash, her first instinct is to glance around, alert for an attack. But when everything seems quiet and peaceful in their surrounding area, she rushes instead towards the person crouched near one of the pillars.

She doesn't take his demand personally - he's clearly quite distraught over something. In her own way, she recognizes that all too well, even if she doesn't know what could have caused it. ]

Are you hurt?

pours shun threads over u

[revolutionfalcon]

[The fact that Shun doesn't recognise this woman has him particularly wary, and he watches her closely for a few moments as if deciding whether to answer her question. It at least means he's not going to be trying to hide his reactions, but purely because he doesn't trust her enough to take his eyes off her while he's in this condition.

Eventually, he lets out a slight, bitter sound through his teeth.]

No. So you can go away. [Somehow, he's in an even less welcoming mood than usual, which is quite the achievement when one takes his usual attitude into consideration. It doesn't seem like he's prepared to just accept an expression of help from someone he's never met.]

[darkestbefore]

[ He watches her with a wariness that reminds her of a cornered and trapped animal, so no, she's not going anywhere just yet.

Instead, she shifts to sink down in the middle of the bridge, keeping enough of a distance between them that he hopefully won't feel more threatened. Crossing her legs in front of her, she lets her hands rest on her knees, palms open and where he can see them. ]

While I am glad you're not injured, you still don't seem to be in any state of mind for me to just leave you here. It's alright. I'll come no closer. [ A pause before she hazards a guess, because she can see the splash of color of familiar blossoms from here. ] Was it the flowers?

[revolutionfalcon]

[Shun's eyes narrow as Yona instead chooses to sit down where she is, but at least she isn't getting closer. The word of assurance doesn't seem to do much for him, making him part his lips slightly to display gritted teeth, but the way he pauses at her question probably gives away that she's guessed the root of the problem.

Though he continues watching her suspiciously for a few moments longer, eventually he concedes, even if it sounds ground out still.]

So you heard them too. [Or maybe not the same "them" he did, but...something. He's not quite sure what's going on with them.]

B

[priforprince]

You're too noisy.

[ GUESS WHO'S STANDING BEHIND YOU

GUESS WHO HAS NO SELF-PRESERVATION INSTINCTS

IF YOU GUESSED "SHIKYOIN 'SHOULD PROBABLY NOT HAVE GOTTEN OFF THE HORSE SHE HAS TIED UP OVER THERE' HIBIKI",

YOU GET A SOLID GOLD HIBIKI STATUE ]

[revolutionfalcon]

[As soon as Shun hears her, he lets out a long, hissing breath before he turns towards her. It should be obvious enough that he's in an even less pleasant mood than usual, and he levels a glare on Hibiki, cracking his damaged knuckles as he does. It's probably a good thing she showed up just after he finished with the bag, otherwise he wouldn't have even given her this much leeway.]

You get one chance to shut up and leave. This is none of yours or anyone else's business. [But particularly not hers, especially since she's basically on his temple grounds. Not that it's the most obvious when all that's really visible from here is a hill and a bunch of trees to one side.]

[priforprince]

Noise pollution is my business if I have to hear it!

[ At least those wind chimes that have been ringing off and on lately are pretty. You're just disrupting her day! What nerve. ]

Head indoors if you're going to make a fuss.

[ Maxie averts his equine head. He has nothing to do with whatever is about to happen. ]

A

[reformedsinner]

[The way Shun's backing away from the flowers, gaze fixed, face bone-white, is extremely recognizable. Hakkai's far enough away that he could have gone around, and left the man to recover on his own from whatever memory it is that's been brought back to him.

He'd heard Kanan's voice himself yesterday, laughing and teasing him about being a god when he'd been so firm, once, about the problem of evil.

Then she had fallen silent, and asked: How can you stand to even look at a half-youkai?

He'd had to go back inside to sit down. Later, he'd come back with shears and a spade. His garden didn't need that particular, lying shade of red.

Whatever it is Shun has heard, he thinks, it's certain to have been something he doesn't want Hakkai in particular to know about... but when he'd been helpless in distress, and obstructing a public roadway, Shun hadn't left him to crawl away alone. Hakkai's lips thin in decision, and he approaches. He doubts Shun's even seen him yet when he voices his challenge. Shun's eyes aren't quite in focus.]

You.

[There's no point, after all, in pretty dishonesty.]

Can you stand?

[revolutionfalcon]

[Despite the lack of focus, Shun isn't beyond recognising a voice, and he stiffens rather obviously when Hakkai speaks. Of the people he'd be willing to let see him in this position, Hakkai falls somewhere off the bottom of the list.

If he wasn't so preoccupied with that, he'd almost snort at Hakkai's address. It's a familiar one to Shun, the same kind of way he addresses people he's not overly fond of, and it seems fitting. After helping Hakkai in about the rudest and most unpleasant way he could have, it seems he's about to get it turned back on him.

But he prefers it that way, really. Falsifying civility is just a decorative lie for other people's benefit.

One hard, wary eye peers out from under Shun's fringe, since he's still coiled in somewhat of a defensive position. His fingers tighten against the wood of the pole, and wordlessly, glaring the whole way, he pulls himself into an upright position.

He's still shivering, though, and it's hard to tell if his legs would hold him without a support, because his arm is still wrapped around the post.]

Stupid question. [It's even more curt and short than his usual speech, but he's still trying to claim more ability than he really has right now.]

[reformedsinner]

[So stupid a question, Hakkai notes, that he can't come up with an answer. His death-grip on the post might be all that's keeping Shun standing right now. His legs are certainly shaking almost as badly as his shoulders.

Comfort and compassion isn't going to help, he reflects. Shun has too much pride to accept it easily, and Hakkai has too much pride to offer it where it's not wanted. No -- it'll have to be the uncivil version of assistance. It's a good thing he doesn't mind that so much.

He leans back against the lacquered wood of the bridge railing, and crosses his arms, watching Shun for a few more seconds.]

Is it really?

[Another moment of silence, as he considers, and then looks away over the river. He won't lie: no I'm sure it wasn't your fault, I'm sure it's a lie. He doesn't know what Shun saw, and he doesn't particularly want to.

Instead, he says, slowly:]

What's past... is past. The dead are dead.

B!

[shadowrevenger]

[Ren ended up missing training yesterday, due to getting unexpectedly busy on the Near Shore with requests and then Yukine. That just makes him especially determined to make up the time today, and so he appears in the growth in front of Shun's temple a little earlier than he would on a normal training day.

Thankfully, he notices the sounds before he can get too lost searching for Shun, and it doesn't take too long to figure out where it's coming from and make his way there. He slows a bit when he spots Shun and what he's doing (and the really awful look on his face), pauses when he's a few feet away, and then decides the worst that can happen is Shun hitting him--which he'd be doing anyway if they were training--and keeps going. He finally comes to a stop next to Shun and grabs for his hand so he can frown at it--and then frown up at Shun with a fair bit of concern.]

What happened?

[revolutionfalcon]

[The sound of a direct approach has Shun turning sharply on the spot, definitely all too ready to get violent if it's someone unwelcome. Thankfully, he recognises Ren before he can do more than pull one hand back, and though he tries to hide his hand before Ren can grab at it, he doesn't quite make it in time.

It'll probably be obvious how long and how violently he's been doing this - his knuckles are swollen to the point they look like they might bruise given a bit more time, and there's one or two spots at the very forefront where the skin has started to crack and even bleed a little.

At the question, he turns his head away a bit. He doesn't want to lie to Ren about what happened, but at the same time, he doesn't really want to think about what happened.]

It's... [Thinking about it just makes it harder to force out even that much, and for a moment or two, his mouth tightens. He almost looks nauseous, though he holds the back of his other curled fist against his mouth to hide that detail.]

Yesterday. Something happened with those spider lilies growing everywhere.

[shadowrevenger]

[Ah, Shun is doing the turning-his-head-away thing they're both prone to do when it something they don't want to talk about. So it isn't just something that's made him angry, it's something that's really upset him too. A whole lot more than any other time Ren's been around to see it, judging by what he is able to see of Shun's face.

Ren clasps both his hands around Shun's injured one and squeezes very lightly, careful not to hurt him too much more than he already is. It's probably a silly question to ask given how upset shun is, but he's going to ask it anyway. He's not really sure what shun means by the spider lilies being a problem, so he'd ask just to find out more about that, really.]

Do you want to talk about it?