thenearshore | 23 - Crazy Cat Shuffle

23 - Crazy Cat Shuffle

Who: Everyone!
What: Crazy Cat Shuffle
When: September 20
Where: Shibuya & Ikebukuro, as well as the Far Shore
Summary: The new Crazy Cat mascot keychains are sparking real passion in Tokyo's hot spots. Brawls have broken out over the extra-rare versions, and all of this angst is attracting ayakashi. The gods have been asked to step in before things get out of control.

Crossing Crisis

the very rarest kind!

Sunshine Struggle

Taking Stock

Bad Kitty

In Summary:

Placate the crowds
Squash bitty ayakashi
Struggle with temptation
Defeat the cat invasion
Have fun~

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[A: Taking Stock]

[This entire cat craze is possibly the most ridiculous event Shun has witnessed in the five and a half months he's been here, but that's just a testament to the fact that something is very wrong about it. And considering the reaction of the crowd to that truck overturning, he really doesn't need to be told they're being compelled by something.

He manages to land on the overturned vehicle by leaping from a nearby rooftop, and immediately jumps into the crowd to start shoving or hurling people back the way they came. He's much gentler with any younger people under the influence, but older teenagers and adults he's fully ready to throw back onto the street if it means he's not going to have to deal with them again five minutes later. Anyone who gets particularly violent, he instead downs with a quick hit to whatever the most conveniently available pressure point happens to be.

It means he can't check on the driver while he's dealing with this, though, and if anyone comes to help, he'll instead nod towards the truck just behind him.]

I can handle this. Check on the driver.

--

[B: Bad Kitty]

[Shun doesn't take any of the keychains back himself, but once it becomes obvious ayakashi are behind the problem, he goes back to the Far Shore to find one of his shinki. However, he catches a flicker of movement from across the grounds almost as soon as he comes out of his garden, and rather than seek out what he actually came here for, he goes to track down what that is first.

The end result is him facing down one of the ayakashi well away from the help he was initially looking for, without any way to actually rend the thing. Slipping to one side with a hiss of annoyance as the big cat ayakashi swipes at him, he pulls out and uncaps his canteen of blessed water and throws some right at its face.]

Who the hell was stupid enough to bring these things back here? [Also, he could use some help between that complaining.]

--

[C: Catfight]

[After managing to get hold of Kotori, however careful he might have to be with her considering the size of these things, Shun heads back out to start really dealing with the cat ayakashi plague. He's very particular about the way he deals with them, since he can't afford to be waving Kotori's vessel form around too carelessly, weakening them first before rending them when he can get a good hit in to the head.

Even if he'll only be able to do this for so long with her, Shun's going to make the most of what he can, and so anyone else out dealing with the cat ayakashi stands a fair chance of having him show up. The vessel in his hand is a bird-styled war hammer with a crack down its length, and he's as precise about his movements with it as it's possible to be with a weapon like that, swinging it just sharply enough against the head of one of the cats to prompt the flash of white light that shreds its form.]

How many of these have you seen so far? [Asking whoever he's come across, because if there are still people bringing these keychains across Shores and increasing the number of ayakashi, he's going to personally track them down and kick their asses.]

[ Sunshine Struggle ]

Nonsense.

[ Hibiki watches the crazed shoppers from this cafe, sipping at her tea judgmentally. ] Where's the point in getting worked up over such a plaything?

[ ...If you're looking for help exterminating an ayakashi, well, here is an ~~idol~~ idle god. But she doesn't seem eager. ]

[ Wildcat Wildcard ]

[ Anyone opening the door to Apollo's temple is going to get a nasty surprise: a veritable mountain of small slips of paper, falling out of the door right onto them, threatening to bowl them over. It seems the whole hallway had filled with the things. Each and every one of them has a variant of the same prayer written on it:

"Oh please, box office god-sama! Get me a Blue-Star Cat as my lucky charm for my show! Until I get one, I'm gonna talk like this for luck, nya!"

Anyone having opened the door and had these slips dumped on them will hear something faint inside: ]

That one!

[ And a faint trumpet fanfare. A pause, and: ]

Here!

[ And a faint trumpet fanfare.

Obviously something very important is happening. ]

[ Crossing Crisis ]

[ If you choose to examine why that line isn't moving, check the front. The person currently occupying the prime real estate brought a Permes handbag to fill with cats.

All of which are blue and have stars on them.

Hibiki closes her eyes, putting in her next coin. She focuses very hard. She turns the dial for the machine.

Another blue cat with a star on it pops out. ]

Three to go.

[ Bad Kitty ]

[ A cat ayakashi (ayakitty?) is on the loose! And it's playing with some sort of ragged, worn-out, deflated toy. ]

So tasty, mya~ So much fun, mya~ Going to munch on this allllll daaaay, mya!

[ The toy grunts.

Oops. ]

[A: Sunshine Struggle]

[Considering he can't exactly do anything like be a crossing guard without potentially alerting the entire Near Shore to the existence of complete what the fuckery, Davesprite is keeping an eye on the situation in Sunshine City. It's...not great, he can say that much for sure, but while he initially just spends his time there trying to block the greedy ayakashi from shoppers with borderlines, or occasionally even sniping them with an offensive one from above, he draws the line at people trying to steal to get their fix.

If he spots anyone doing that, he descends from his spot near the ceiling to tap their shoulder with a taloned finger. This generally ends in a quick turn and some brief screaming as the person drops their ill-gotten gains and runs off saying something about bird people, ghosts, or bird person ghosts. Picking up the dropped wallet or purse, Davesprite slips it back into the pocket of the person it was stolen from.]

Yeah, fuck you too, buddy, but if it works, it works.

--

[B: Bad Kitty]

[Okay, so Davesprite might have picked up one of the poor, common keychains that got dropped by someone and abandoned. And then he might have gone back to the Far Shore to see if he could find either Hajime or a better way of fending off the greedy ayakashi.

And he now may or may not be facing down one of the huge cat ayakashi. He's pulled his sword from his stomach, however little use it's going to be to him, and as it lunges for him with its jaw wide open, he holds the blade horizontally and catches it against the thing's mouth, pushing it back.]

For fuck's sake, wasn't Battle Royale 2: The Streets bad enough, now the dolls are hiding some demonic magical bullshit as well? [For once he's actually bothered enough to sound like he's asking a question.]

[Crossing Crisis]

[She's not even here to help out, originally. She'd just wanted to wander some place familiar (and boy is it a bit strange and nostalgic to see the cities whole again and not like, on fire) and got caught up in these shenanigans instead.]

E-excuse me, s-sorry, um, please-- [She's jostled by the crowds, knocking into people, getting shoved by people yelling who think she's trying to cut in line-- and down she falls. Mikan hits the ground with a cry and immediately thinks that being on the ground is somehow a little safer.

Which is why she can be found crawling on hands and knees through the crowd, though it's possible she's the cause of people tripping and falling themselves once in a while.] Excuse me, excuse me... [Don't mind her, she's just trying to live her life.]

[Taking Stock: A]

[Where there's a crash, there's injured people! First aid kit in hand, Mikan is prowling the streets for anyone hurt in the crash. Anyone who's caught glimpses of her around the Heavens might be in for a surprise when she's being shockingly competent, moving from person to person and treating injuries.

She's quick and methodical, expression one of intense concentration as she works on people with an almost fever-like intensity.

A.1 Maybe you're one of the injured she's working on? Despite how much you might insist you're okay, Mikan gives you a stubborn look and grabs at your arm with a surprisingly strong grip] Please, sit down and let me look at you first! If there's nothing wrong, th-then there's nothing wrong! But, if there is something and it's ignored, it'll cause bigger complications down the road!

[A.2 Or maybe you're trying to help out too, only to have Mikan run up to you, waving you down for your attention. Once she has it, she doubles over, one hand resting on her knees as she catches her breath] E-excuse me! I-I'm sorry, I don't mean to b-bother you, but, um, well--

[She shakes her head and clenches her fist as she straightens. No now isn't the time for this!!] Pl-please, help me! I need to m-move this man to a safer place to examine him, b-but I can't carry him on my own! I-I'll do whatever you want in return, b-but please help!

[Taking Stock: B]

[Once again, she was only trying to help. She was just picking up random toys and using her nurse's apron as a makeshift holder when she's confronted by some nerds demanding kitties and accusing her of trying to steal fro the stash they've already claimed to be stealing from. She looks terrified and backs away a few steps, stammering apologies as the kitties fall from her apron and she accidentally steps on a few, managing to break a couple. The horrified shrieking of the otaku are honestly sort of impressive]

I-I'm sorry! Pl-please, don't be mad! I-I'll do anything! D-do you want me to strip? I'll st-strip, or eat bugs, or, u-um, y-you can cut my hair, or even punch me!

Please forgive me...! [She's definitely crying and Mikan's managed to take an awkward situation and make it even more so.]

Edited 2017-12-02 04:08 (UTC)

A. Crossing Crisis

Everything a god does is righteous, huh...?

"Hyaaaha ha ha ha!"

The residents of the Near Shore didn't quite process the source of the laughter, their mortal minds being ill-prepared to accept a talking book gripped firmly in the hands of a soulless shinki. Nor did they notice just how the throng of demons appeared among them, though the keen-eyed among the gods and shinki could spot the minions of the Overlord crashing down from the sky.

"As an Overlord, I'm required to cause suffering and despair among the weak and foolish," Zetta explained to literally no one. "This is a little small-time for me, but what the hell. SEIZE THE GOODS!"

Now the humans of the Near Shore took note, as the demon minions of the Overlord shoved and pushed their way through the crowd, mercilessly shouldering aside women and children alike. Up in front, an eager man held his hands below the dispensing chute, waiting for the machine to dispense weal or woe upon him -- but what it would be, he'd never know, for a demon girl reached straight over him, grabbed the machine, and hauled it into the air over her head. Next to her, the Overlord's army gave four more of then machines the same treatment.

To describe the scene that followed as a riot would be underselling it, as horrified and furious snarls and screams split the air and the humans around them surged forward, eager to take back the machines or take what was left before they could get theirs. Somehow, in the middle of the fray, the Overlord's minions managed to break free nonetheless, scrambling for the fringes of Shibuya with their ill-gotten gains, and the Overlord's shinki right behind them as Zetta chortled.

Bad Kitty

"I'm fighting cats?" Zetta said. Before him, a pair of warriors faced the ayakashi with sword and axe drawn, while to his side spellcaster minions readied their staves, and a healer stood in the rear ready to mend any wounds the minions endured. "I really have started back at the beginning. To think I, the most badass freaking Overlord in the entire cosmos, have to battle weak spirits and felines." The plaintive, sad tone in Zetta's voice almost had the power to move hearts -- but not repel ayakashi. Without the Overlord's guidance, his minions hadn't so much as twitched while one of the felines slipped right past his minions to leap at the book its claws outstretched.

Zetta, of course, had no power to defend. Blight spread across the book's cover where the claws scratched it, swirling around all the minions abruptly as well.

"Nyaaaaaargh!" Zetta exclaimed, as the minions leaped into a swirling dogpile of dust and blows that looked straight out of Looney Tunes by the way of sprite animation. A moment later, the book spun out of the fray to skid on the ground, cast out of the battle that still raged in its absence.

"Damn..."

Crossing Crisis

[Really, it's too easy.]

[As a ninja, Edge is an accomplished thief as well; stealing the opponent's resources to turn against them is a time-honored battle technique. But here he barely has to try, because no one notices the man breezing past them as they crowd around the machines. Those who take more than their fair share, he gently lifts charms from -- not all of them, just enough to even the score and give everyone a shot. Then, with a quick glance over them to appraise them, he flicks them out into the crowd with skilled aim and good judgment. Valuable charms drop practically into the hands of children clambering to spend their few coins, while good-natured collectors who suffered for waiting their turn like decent people find a pair coming towards them just in time to grab them.]

[It's good work, and he's feeling pleased.]

Sunshine Struggle

Oh -- hell!

[In over his head, Edge stares across one of his blades against a mass of swarming ayakashi. He'd started out so simple with manageable tasks, driving off one or two here or there, with sword and shuriken to send them running.]

[And then he'd chased one down an alley, making sure the damn thing fled, only to find this host waiting for him. Had they planned it, or had it just been ill fortune on his part?]

[Either way, this is bad.]

Edited 2017-12-02 03:53 (UTC)

Taking Stock

[The damaged axles of the truck bend slightly and the suspension flexes that much more as Dust lands atop it, one hand dropped down to support himself as he peers over the side.]

That's not good. Hey! [He calls out to the nearest resident of the Far Shore he can see as he straightens up, drawing his sword in one smooth motion.] I'll get the charms out of the way -- you try to break up the crowd so no one goes stealing all this!

[His part is easy -- Dust flings his hand forward, as his sword blurs into a circle so far the weapon only shows as a distortion of the sights behind it. The sudden vortex is enough to suck the cat charms off the ground and into the whirling blade. The crowd has no idea how to react to this -- which is hopefully a reaction his new ally can capitalize on to break them up.]

Bad Kitty

[As usual, Dust has gotten into this fight alone.]

[As usual, this means nothing to him.]

[Dust vaults over a group of ayakashi, then slashes into them before they can even turn to face him. His movements are graceful and fluid, almost dancelike -- he spins his weapons around his twisting body to put power and length into his strikes, reversing his grip so smoothly his sword seemed bolted to his hand. Before the ayakashi can lash out at him, he dives into a roll that carries him past them to the other side of the pack once more.]

[He can't kill them. He can't win this fight. All he can do is stop them from hurting anyone else -- to hold them until someone else comes to help, or until he can't hold them any more.]

[It didn't matter. This was what he was made for.]

Edited 2017-12-02 04:16 (UTC)

[When he'd found out Hibiki was going to be out and about he hadn't expected to find this. He's giving a little shake of his head as he peers at her, running his fingers through his hair.]

Miss Hibiki, why are you collecting all of those cats?

[His tone is gently but there's just a small edge of concerned scolding there to it.]

Shouldn't you leave some for the others? Or are you going to give those out to special followers, perhaps?

[They are rather cute and if she's collecting so many for such s reason he could certainly get behind that.]

Leave preventing this crisis to me.

[ That doesn't answer his question, Hibiki. But it does psyche her up for her next go-around. After all, there is a cat-astrophe --- er, a crisis, brewing, and only she can prevent it.

Only she can protect her followers from their own folly.

She focuses very hard on the machine. It consumes her entire attention. Focus...focus....

The dial turns. ]

[ A little green cat sticking its tongue out clatters into the tray.

Hibiki stiffens. ]

[Zetta has a certain amount of propriety, which meant that when another god was enacting an evil scheme, he's okay giving them a reasonable amount of time to do it.]

[They'd crossed out of 'reasonable' some time ago.]

Look.

[The book, held firmly in the grip of the Overlord's soulless shinki, finally has to speak up.. Around those two mill a disconsolate and disgruntled group of demons, who idly challenge each other to rock-paper-scissors battles or read tourism pamphlets (or occasionally point out landmarks and yell "I SAW THAT IN 'THE WORLD ENDS WITH YOU'!", but no one was paying attention to that guy).]

I'm all in favor of cruelty and evil, but can you hurry it up a little? Some of us have our own acts of malice to perpetrate.

Edited (actually no, let me swap this) 2017-12-02 17:55 (UTC)

[ ....Rgh. Hibiki flinches, hand on the dial.

She's so close. So close to her goal, and yet... ]

Lectured by a book....that's so stupid, I can't concentrate.

[Said book smirks.]

I may be a book at the moment, but that's just temporary! In fact, you've been lectured by the almighty Lord Zetta, the most badass freaking Overlord in the cosmos! This is the most supreme lecture you or anyone could ever ask to receive!

...So, uh, seriously, can we step up the evil game here for a minute? I get the whole 'torture the crowd with waiting' deal, but I think you're about an inch from violence erupting...

A genius's pace cannot be rushed.

[ She could go on, about how compared to the disaster she's fending off, a little waiting is nothing, but - that would involve this book being worthy of an explanation from Shikyoin Hibiki. So obviously that isn't going to happen.

Still, she does wish to proceed. Hibiki takes a deep breath and tries to concentrate again, despite the newfound presence of...irritants.

Drat. ]

A genius would accommodate their pace for how likely it is an Overlord is about to get fed up and enact his OWN plan because he's sick of waiting.

[Zetta clearly isn't about to stop being an irritant either.]

[...Neither are his minions, who have abruptly crowded around the machine in a tight and narrow circle, all eager to see what she pulls. A swift betting ring erupts, with a weird penguin thing quickly scribbling odds on various results on a chalkboard while the minions put up their own charms on different possibilities.
(Current leader: "The Overlord smashes something, we never find out" at even odds.)]

[ The person doing the pulling looks pretty close to wanting to smash things, herself. The minions are speaking in low enough voices that she can't really make out ~~any verbal tics~~ what they're saying ~~yet~~, but she's gritting her teeth and her shoulders are getting stiffer by the moment.

Focus. Why won't they be quiet? She has...to focus.... ]

Turn! Turn! Turn! Turn!

[One or two minions begin the chant. But it rapidly proves infectious.]

Turn! Turn! Turn! Turn!

[Within moments, the whole dozen of them are chanting it, pumping their fists (or flippers) to emphasize each repetition.]

Turn! Turn! Turn! Turn!

[Their feet stomp the floor in synch, and the overwhelming swell of rhythm begins to bleed out of the Far Shore's natural concealment.]

Turn! Turn! Turn! Turn!

[The chant sweeps over the crowd like a wave, which breaks around the baffled book that is Zetta and roars past unhindered. The machine shakes with the concentrated stomps of the human onlookers, all joining in out of enthusiasm or impatience or simple herd mentality.]

TURN! TURN! TURN! TURN!

Miss Hibiki, it's not a real crisis you know. They're just toy collectibles.

[Alan is moving forward picking up the small green cat toy, idly touching a finger to that stuck out tongue more than a little amused by it. He can admit they're cute, he can see the appeal.]

Everyone just wants a chance to get one of these little things. Especially those there. [He gestures to the bag of Blue-Star Cats.] And people taking more than a proper fair turn seem to be the biggest problem I've seen thus far.

[Is he using the mom tone with Hibiki? Yes. Yes he is. That gentle scolding one that is quietly showing disapproval but ultimately leaving the choice in Hibiki's hands... for now.]

Kkkkhhh.....

[ Hibiki's eyebrows are twitching out of control. She reaches for the dial again, but her fingers are all twitchy, too. They're curved and stiff, but she can't make her hand close. ]

[ Her vision begins to swim. Hibiki's entire universe, both outside and within her head, is nothing but looming silhouettes of chanting minions and strangers. ]

Kkkkkhhhhhhkkkkghgkkkhhh.....

[ Her chin tucks in. Beads of sweat form on her forehead. ]

ENOUGH, ALREADY!!!!!

[ Hibiki whirls around, throwing an arm out to the side. She's shedding vein-throbbing emotes from her head like someone's making popcorn on the stove and forgot a lid. ]

I CAN'T TAKE THIS!!! ALL OF YOU, GIVE IT A REST!!!!!!!!!!!

[ Meanwhile, a gacha container clatters into the slot behind Hibiki.

She'd bumped the dial when she'd turned and gestured. ]

[The entire crowd goes silent.]

[DEAD silent, like someone had smashed the speakers and left the sound output trapped in digital limbo, straining to get out a wire that no longer had an out to go to.]

[First to recover, the patchwork penguin creature steps away from its chalkboad, pointing a flipper at Hibiki in chastising accusation.]

It's not all about you, dood.

[ Hibiki's jaw drops. Her eyes white out. ]

"Dood"....

[ The gacha capsule falls out of the machine and breaks open.

Oh, hey. She got another Blue-Star Cat. ]

[The silence lasts for another second -- and then the crowd explodes. Primarily the demon minions, two of whom leap into the air in panoplies of joy, several of which had collapsed to the ground in despair and agony, and one of who was off in the corner muttering, "I was saying 'Too-urn'." The Prinny nearly vanishes beneath a swirl of bettors trying to claim their winnings, while Zetta, alone in midair, heaves a weary sigh.]

Are we done yet?

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23 - Crazy Cat Shuffle

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Crossing Crisis

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1/hibiki

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