thenearshore | -Overflow- for 24

Yes but of course your goddess must have need of you and I would not wish to interrupt, so I must simply invite others and wait for them to come visit me.

[She lets out a small breath of amusement at his curse word, still trying to smile in spite of the topic.]

That is why I wish to focus on some of the good things - like the fact that spending time among you who are newer to the Far Shore makes the days pass by so much quicker now. Almost three months have flown by since I first met you all!

[And she's genuinely excited about that.]

Honestly, she doesn't have need of me all that often. And she's got another shinki who's just better at shinki shit than I am anyway, so you know, it's fine.

[It's an honest statement to say Kairi's better at shinki stuff than he is, since she knows more spells, but that might also be some of his self-loathing talking. He'd felt inadequate as an exemplar even when it was just him and Yuto however long ago, and now it's happening again, because they always have something on him.

The "three months" thing seems to surprise him a little, though.] Damn, it doesn't feel like that long, does it, time flies when you're having fun.

[She doesn't feel like it's her place to speak on behalf of the feelings of other gods, so she tries to simply place her hand on the young man's shoulder.]

The service you rendered to me could only be accomplished by a kind soul. I must implore you to consider that you have been able to take the form you do have and the skills that you do have and accomplish great things with that, regardless of the quality of shinki you feel yourself to be. I will say so to your goddess if need be.

[She is still in his debt, in her mind.]

[Though he makes a pretty good effort to disguise it, it's just about impossible to miss the way Davesprite tenses slightly under that touch before relaxing, like gentle touches aren't something he's very used to.

His very first response to that might be as expected, but then again, it might not be.] Nah, it's not a her problem, she thinks I'm the bees' knees or something equally sunshine and saccharine or whatever. I just don't really think I fit the whole exemplar deal.

[Yuto had been her shinki first, and the only reason the exemplar title bypassed him is because he left Hajime for another god around the time Davesprite showed up. And now there's Kairi, who's only been around about as long as him or even less as far as he knows, yet is still better at all the trappings of being a shinki. It's hard for someone like him not to feel out of place as the "leader".]

[Well she supposes it's technically a good thing that his goddess doesn't have a poor opinion of him. She does remove her hand back to the sleeves of her outfit, though.]

Having never had shinki in my employ, I cannot understand the situation fully. However...

[Goodness, how to phrase it.]

I must ask then if it is not possible to achieve more... perhaps a recognition by a god of fortune... that might undeniably prove to yourself you are as worthy as your goddess and I perceive you to be of our esteem?

[For a moment, Davesprite looks a little bit surprised - it seems like a far length to go to for someone like him, considering how badly he thinks of himself and feels like everyone else should think of him too. But then it strikes him once more what Orihime's existence must have been like, and he ruffles his wings up a little before giving a deceptively casual, but still somewhat bitter smile.]

I dunno how many people you've met who just kinda hate themselves, Orihime, but one big gesture doesn't usually fix the problem. I appreciate the thought, though.

[It does sound true, at least. He's not trying to shrug off her concern, he just knows it isn't going to be that easy.]

[She nods knowingly.]

However, does it not also follow that if fixing the problem requires ten, or even a hundred gestures, that one is indeed necessary to start the effort?

[She doesn't think he should be able to deny that much. Then again, no, she hasn't met anyone else with self-esteem as low as his, perhaps even including herself. She's just a pessimist about her situation, rather than outright hating her own existence.]

I mean, you're not gonna be the first person to try, so it's not really starting the effort anymore. [Davesprite can't really argue with that, as much as he'd like to. He always gets the feeling whenever this happens that he should cut and run, and burn the bridge so nobody makes the same mistake again, but he just can't do it to anyone who's gotten this far here and he doesn't really know why.

He couldn't do it to Jade, either, he remembers that much. He'd just broken it off and turned tail and told himself she hated him now, because surely it must have been the truth after all that.]

But if you're asking me, I'm always gonna think it's a waste of time, you know, self-loathing problems and all that good shit.

Very well. I shall stop asking and merely speak my mind on the matter, as the situation warrants.

[She says with a smile that evokes a kind of confidence that came easily to her in ages past. She's glad to not be the one starting the effort, though.]

Is there anything that you are looking forward to tonight? It is a party after all.

[And she's looking for an opportunity to improve his sour mood somehow. If that's possible.]

[Davesprite figures "I came because it's a party" isn't an answer that's likely to cut it here, so he shrugs slightly, feathers rustling.]

I dunno. I mostly just came to hang out and catch up, formal shit isn't really my favoured kind of party. I'm pretty sure someone would die again of shock if I offered to perform at something like this.

[As superior a music offering as electro-beats over weird traditional Japanese-Western not-fusion would be, in his opinion.]

[Orihime lights up with this new information, happily dismissing his less enthusiastic response to the party. She's not in charge of it after all, so she can't be too put out.]

What is your skill that you perform?

[...This one might be difficult to explain, and Davesprite comes close to steepling his fingers before he figures he's going to have to dip the toes he doesn't have in here first.]

How much do you know about modern music and stuff people use for it, because it's gonna be a longer explanation if you don't know a lot about that.

[She is indeed puzzled by 'stuff people use for it' because what else do people use music for if not to listen to...? Perhaps dancing? But that is not 'stuff' so she falls back on what she knows about the paraphernalia of music performance.]

Well... I suppose that much like these phones allow us to speak to one another across great distances, I am aware that radio predated that. I am also aware that music can be played once, and then heard over again without the musicians present. Additionally...

[She thinks for a moment, then puts her hands over her ears.]

There are ways to listen to music privately, correct? They go over your ears but I cannot remember what they are called just now.

[Then she smiles proudly, as if surely somewhere in there she has met his expectations. Those are all marvels to her, after all.]

[Well, that does tell him plenty enough about what she knows, which isn't a great deal. Still, he can probably manage to explain it, though when she mentions the private listening thing, he taps the top of one of his ears.]

Headphones. They're pretty useful for the kind of music I do. But bear with me here, because I'm gonna try and explain it as simply as I can but even some of the newcomer gods don't really get it either, so you know.

[He makes a slight shrug as if to say he won't really mind if she doesn't get it.]

Anyway, like you said, music gets recorded now, so you can play it over and over. If you take the recordings and put the sound into a computer, you can sorta cut bits out of it or put extra bits in, and repeat them and stuff like that. Reworking a piece of music that already exists, kinda, or making a new one out of a lot of tiny bits of music that are already a thing. That's the kind of music I make.

[No technical terms here, just the very basic gist of how someone who does electronic music generally rolls.]

-Overflow- for 24 - Autumn Reception

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