Ebisu (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
chibisu) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thenearshore2019-03-16 10:44 am
chibisu) wrote in thenearshore2019-03-16 10:44 am
[closed]
Who: Ebisu, Aomi, and various out-temple workers
What: Time for a relaxing trip to Kanagawa, before the next thing blows up.
Where: Kanagawa
When: Sometime after that compound mess
Kanagawa Prefecture has a lot of good points. There's an opening to the ocean, a lake for touring, beautiful views of Mt. Fuji wherever you look, and all sorts of interesting museums or temples. Aomi, the organizer of this little trip, agrees for everyone to meet at Iiyama Kannon an hour or two before noon. An easy famous place that people hopefully won't get lost going to, and all. Until then, well, people are free to go wherever they like. They don't even have to stay in Atsugi, where the meeting area is supposed to be. There are beaches not that far off, zoos to enjoy various animals, parks where carefully cultivated flowers are in gleeful bloom, a bustling Chinatown, and even the little island of Enoshima.
When the time comes to meet up, however, Aomi can be found alongside Ebisu with a bulging backpack and he does a quick headcount to make sure everyone is there before continuing on. The ultimate destination isn't any of the many tourist attractions in Kanagawa, but rather he leads away from the cities and towards the forests of the prefecture. Aomi would have made sure to remind everyone that morning over text to wear hiking boots.... so hopefully they all remember to do that, because the path chosen is one that has no actual path at all. Hopefully no one gets hurt, although it shouldn't be too hard.
What's the destination? That much becomes obvious once they hit some more even land, where a small stone monument has been placed at the base of a fully blossoming Japanese wisteria. Here, Aomi will let everyone know it's fine to take a break, and settle down. It's here that he'll help spread out some various picnic blankets and begin unpacking from his enormous backpack. He's been courteous enough to pack lunch for just about everyone, and a good variety in case any one dish doesn't suit someone. There's delectably spicy yokosuka curry, juicy shirokoro horumon, rare to get shonan pork sausages, and a variety of sushi that takes full advantage of being from a seaside prefecture. Everyone is free to relax beneath the wisteria blossoms and enjoy the view peeking out from the trees.
What: Time for a relaxing trip to Kanagawa, before the next thing blows up.
Where: Kanagawa
When: Sometime after that compound mess
Kanagawa Prefecture has a lot of good points. There's an opening to the ocean, a lake for touring, beautiful views of Mt. Fuji wherever you look, and all sorts of interesting museums or temples. Aomi, the organizer of this little trip, agrees for everyone to meet at Iiyama Kannon an hour or two before noon. An easy famous place that people hopefully won't get lost going to, and all. Until then, well, people are free to go wherever they like. They don't even have to stay in Atsugi, where the meeting area is supposed to be. There are beaches not that far off, zoos to enjoy various animals, parks where carefully cultivated flowers are in gleeful bloom, a bustling Chinatown, and even the little island of Enoshima.
When the time comes to meet up, however, Aomi can be found alongside Ebisu with a bulging backpack and he does a quick headcount to make sure everyone is there before continuing on. The ultimate destination isn't any of the many tourist attractions in Kanagawa, but rather he leads away from the cities and towards the forests of the prefecture. Aomi would have made sure to remind everyone that morning over text to wear hiking boots.... so hopefully they all remember to do that, because the path chosen is one that has no actual path at all. Hopefully no one gets hurt, although it shouldn't be too hard.
What's the destination? That much becomes obvious once they hit some more even land, where a small stone monument has been placed at the base of a fully blossoming Japanese wisteria. Here, Aomi will let everyone know it's fine to take a break, and settle down. It's here that he'll help spread out some various picnic blankets and begin unpacking from his enormous backpack. He's been courteous enough to pack lunch for just about everyone, and a good variety in case any one dish doesn't suit someone. There's delectably spicy yokosuka curry, juicy shirokoro horumon, rare to get shonan pork sausages, and a variety of sushi that takes full advantage of being from a seaside prefecture. Everyone is free to relax beneath the wisteria blossoms and enjoy the view peeking out from the trees.
no subject
It's also among a family that won't let go so easily, friends that want her safe, that slowly, Ginia is learning there's value in herself and not only what she can offer in service.]
There are worse people to know. I suppose he still owes me a favor, but maybe it's settled itself too.
[Ginia picks at the last of her food, sips at a tea that's already cooled. She trades and deals and has maybe given more favors than she's gotten back, but alliances are perhaps where the benefit comes in. It's by accident she's acquainted with all three Gods of Fortune of the new generation, stranger yet she considers two her friends.]
You keep him close too. Also try to meet Hakkai if you haven't already. I feel like you two would get along.
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[Waver's about finished with his tea; the wagashi he's taking slower. Ah... Hakkai... yes, they've met. He senses such commonality with Hakkai; some differences too.
(unknowing Taoist pantheon buddies among other things)]
I've met him and I rather like him. I believe we probably have a couple of things in common.
Though I don't know him well. Tell me about him?
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It's mostly the dry sense of humor.]
I wouldn't say I know him well, but I respect him. He gave me some good advice when I arrived, when I was still sorting things out.
[Generally speaking, she knows Chikusa better. But Hakkai has her respect. Ginia pats her left shoulder and smiles dryly.]
He's the reason I still have my arm and didn't die a second time.
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[Whether or not Waver knows Hakkai used to be a shinki, he did get that general impression overall from his conversation and what he's seen looking back.
Then he frowns.]
Hakkai was at that ablution?
[... that would explain perhaps a few vibes he picked upppp........]
So was Chikusa?
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Chikusa asked me to help. Ken was the third.
[She had no idea what she was getting into. She'd heard about them and had the strength to endure at the time, but it was a foolish mistake.
At the same time, if she hadn't tried and failed with Ayumu, would she have succeeded when it was Joss's life on the line?]
I suppose I have mixed feelings about ablutions, but that can be said for almost anything about the shinki lifestyle. I swore after that I'd never do another ablution. That statement lasted all of a month.
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[Statement, not question. It makes sense from the little he knows from previous conversations and all Waver does is look to Ginia for confirmation.
It always comes back to that ablution and that shinki-turned-goddess. She sees Hakkai in him. She sees her in him.]
Whenever it comes up among the old shinki, it's given the air of a punishment, rather than just a purification rite. [Waver's face is sober; he's read and heard how painful it is. But as he's already told Ginia before, he knows his knowledge as it stands doesn't do it justice.] I can't blame you, based on what I do know. But... well, life is rarely kind like that. [A bitter chuckle.] It puts us in places where we might not want to be. Where we can do good or effect positive change in ourselves or others, but the way getting there isn't healthy, and that leaves wounds of its own.
It's obviously been weighing on your mind, given our past conversations. ... do you... want to talk about it? Are you in a place where you can?
[Their conversations are bruising for both of them... Waver will give her every opportunity to back out. He understand the areas where it's dangerous for a shinki to walk - he's stuck in them and going either way would be deadly.
They all hold lives in their hands. Even in lancing the wounds, especially in lancing the wounds and letting the pus bleed out.]
CW: suicidal ideation
I was attacked first and passed out pretty fast from shock and blood loss. I woke up two days later.
[At that point Ayumu was long dead and Chikusa came to visit in the form of an airplane-sized cloud crane. So whatever else happened that night, whatever happened after she was impaled, nearly beheaded, and then tossed aside...
Maybe it's better she doesn't know.
Ginia considers Waver's question, staring into her tea cup for wisdom among the pale green liquid. It's been four months since Ayumu's ablution, three since Joss's. She's over it in the sense that there's nothing left to do and mulling over what happened that night and after is a pointless exercise. It's a closed wound, another memory in a span she'd rather forget about entirely.
But a closed wound isn't a healed wound and it's stuck with her in ways she can't place. She walked away with the wrong idea from her conversation with Hakkai, deciding it was better to die than to cause anyone else to suffer. If she was as far gone as Ayumu was, then wasn't it better to let her die? With luck she'd come back a god and be able to make amends. With luck she'd come back without memories, a fresh start and a third chance at life.
With luck she'd never come back at all.
And yet... she fought for Joss's life, didn't she? Shrugged off every insult and hurtful word and dragged him back because he was worth saving and there's nothing wrong with grief and anger and mourning (murder on the other hand, debatable). Why not let someone do the same for her?
Why even let things reach the point of an ablution? She's fine, she's fine, everything is fine, the mantra of the damned. And it's true on a level, but still waters run deep and untreated trauma has a way of festering.
Ginia is fine now, but it the wrong bad incident, the wrong loss, doesn't take much to make a shinki b̵̢̡̟͓̥̗͈̗̫̊̊̊͗͂̊̊̍͠r̢̞̗̬̣̾̓͂̏̍̔̕͝͝ẹ̛͍͍̫̪̽̽̂͛̂̅͘͜å̲̙͔͚͔̲̘̞̟͙͆͒͗͋̇̌͆͛k̶̡̧̰̣̻̘͈̘̺̏̑͌́̐̋͘͟
Ginia shakes her head, smiles tiredly.]
The past is the past. The dead are dead and the living dead are still here. I'm not sure there's anything less to talk about.
no subject
Waver understands he is not okay. That he is in an unhealthy situation. That in the past, perhaps, though he cannot dwell, that he's been existing in unhealthy ways. That it is okay to not be okay.
He should have been a god. He will be a god. But starting as a shinki has given him a kick in the pants to try and tackle himself in better ways. That he needs to lead for himself and grow inside first.
That he needs to take care of himself. ... slowly learning to love and accept himself for what he was before he moves on and become more. Become better.
Denial is the most dangerous thing for a shinki. Ignorance. The great catch-22 of their existence.
Waver knows not dwelling causes the fall even more than a shinki lingering on their past.]
Then there's not. But...
[He reaches out to grasp her hands and squeeze them.]
If that ever changes, I'm here. We shinki need to look out for each other.
[He'll be there for her if the worst happens, be it as a shinki or god.
... he'll just be there period.]
no subject
It's still no harder.
Maybe it's better she's a shinki and not a god; who would hold her accountable for her feelings if she didn't have to share them with anyone?
Ginia pulls her hands from his, gives them an appreciative squeeze before she resumes typing.]
So we do. Adults too. Don't know if you've noticed, but the average age seems to skew young.
no subject
Just like people are supposed to do.
... it very much is the problem with gods now. Waver knows he's due an intervention with Iskandar soon. Without tipping the applecarts. Without doing further harm.
They're all fucked up and getting more fucked up thanks to this place.]
I sure have. Teenagers. Teenagers everywhere - with a healthy helping of the early twenties. I'm glad my Temple is all adult, but there's slim pickings for people with similar levels of maturity.
no subject
[Hi Shun. Then again, there's someone who went through a huge heaping of trauma. The same with a lot of teens. It's easier to know with the gods, with some of the shinki... she certainly has questions about some of them. Like Suzaku.]
I'm glad my temple is all adult too. Or mostly? A few definitely have apparent ages that make them look young, but when some are a few centuries old, it's a little moot.
[Ginia pauses and smiles across at Waver, the kind of unguarded smile soon to be accompanied by a silly question.]
How old do you think I am?
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... physically? No. No. [Waver places a hand over his dead heart - silly it is.] You are cunning my lady Ginia - your trap superb. But I, a gentleman, recognize it for what it is. I know better than to ever guess a woman's age.
[Then he wheezes dryly a bit.]
About the same.
Me?
no subject
She studies Waver in turn, lightly turning her head one way and then the other, a light production as she makes a decision. He's certainly a mature one, sporting some serious lines around his eyes and forehead at time. But she wouldn't say he's terribly old either.]
Early to middle thirties. I'd skew younger if it weren't for your wrinkles. Though now that I know you can hide the grey in your hair, perhaps you're secretly ancient.
no subject
[An amused scoff. He's older than that and the ancient thing is on the nose. He slaps his chest like he was shot through the heart.
... and it's an indication of the wrongness of him being like this by the rules of the system. Waver died ready to move on and resolved to his sacrifice - his only desire was to be with his king afterwards. And since Iskandar was already dead and on the Throne...
He wasn't asking for more life. He earned his own enshrinement though he doesn't realize it quite yet.]
Maybe I ought to set up shop at Siwa and give Oracle-ing a go. I certainly have the scrying down.
no subject
[Alas, they'll never be internet famous. All for the better given seemingly everyone's fondness for rooftop running. Ginia studies Waver, mental image leaning more toward the cartoonish as she adds a starry wizard hat and robes to his appearance.]
We should probably head out soon. I'd hate to miss what Aomi has planned.
no subject
[Alas, no internet fame. They could have been idols. Well... Waver's inclination towards Mage secrecy would have gotten in the way of that, but... everyone uses magic in Heaven.
One last bite of wagashi.]
Oh yeah. I don't want to keep people waiting. I'm guessing he gave you no clues?
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[The network is full of all sorts of wonders and a vehicle for entertainment more often than anything else. If it helps someone, it was worth it.]
Only it's an annual tradition. My coworkers refused to ruin the surprise so it must be something nice.
no subject
That might be an idea for later. I think I'll play with the different forms of divination - maybe see if I can do a mean Tarot for instance - around the office first. Some of our coworkers are in to that.
I'll see what's a hit.
[Waver reaches for a napkin.]
I look forward to cracking the mystery, then. Shall we?
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[If it did, most everyone wouldn't have to whale so hard on the games they play. At least they're contributing to the economy. He'll definitely have his share of takers.
As promised, Ginia waves down the server to settle their check.]
Next time we talk and there's food, no business, okay? Or let's try to stave off business as much as possible.
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[Says the gamer.]
... do we need something like a swear jar for that? I think we need something like a swear jar. Sometimes I wonder if we both just can't help ourselves some days.
[SIGH.]
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We're adults who can't help but overthink because we care too much about the people around us.
[Maybe more than themselves. Maybe just her. The server returns with Ginia's change.]
But a swear jar sounds good.
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[Oh... it's both of them. Learning to love yourself is a process, after all.
A bit of a smile.]
We'll figure it out someday.
[It turns a little weak. ... it's h- ... no, he'll figure it out.]
Hopefully.