007 | Clean Up Your Act

[godsoffortune]

Who: Everyone!
What: Spring cleaning
When: All day April 15
Where: All around the Heavens
Summary: The Heavens don't like things being cluttered, so it's time to clean up a little bit.







Main Hall

While the main hall of the Heavens seems spotlessly clean at all times, that's not the case at all. In fact, it's been at least a decade since the last time they actually cleaned everything out properly. There are a lot of hidden closets and back rooms that have layers of dust and dozens of boxes filled with nothing but junk. Who knows, though! You might find something interesting and useful in there along with all the garbage.

Suprises

Unfortunately, some of the older temples on the Far Shore seem to have some interesting surprises tucked away, ranging from cursed artifacts all the way to magical creatures locked up in long-forgotten rooms. You are free to be creative with this as a way to get your characters into trouble while cleaning.

Complimentary Dinner

After all of your hard work, you deserve to have some tasty food and refreshing beverages. So the Heavens have provided that for you, so that you can wind down after a long day. It's not as fancy as the banquets they often put on, but there is a nice array of food and drinks for everyone to enjoy.

Counselling

As usual, there is a white-robed shinki bearing the gold chrysanthemum of Amaterasu sitting at a table in the Main Hall. There is a small sign that denotes her as the counselling shinki. Anyone is welcome to approach her, and she will smile serenely at anyone passing by as well.



In Summary:

• Clean up your home
• Help clean others' homes
• Get the main hall clean too!
• Hope no hidden magic jumps out
• Seek counselling if you need it
• Enjoy your complimentary dinner
• Have fun~

Comments

PIANO...

[existentialcrisis]

[ Ukoku comes up next to him, observing the piano like it belongs in an art museum, hands behind his back and everything. He's not wearing his robes: he looks like he got out of some office meeting, chucked his tie somewhere, and went to take a nap on a couch for a few shirt-creasing hours before he somehow and for some reason made his way to Hazel's temple.

He whistles, the sound of a cartoon weight (or maybe an exorcist, ha ha) falling from the top of a cliff, and follows it up with the equally cartoon sound of that weight landing on something. Then he looks at Hazel, straightfaced.

That's it that's the hello. It might be more friendly if he knew whether their relationship involved a lot of trauma (a lot more trauma? Twice as much trauma as when they were on good terms), but here they are. ]

low scream

[churchbelle]

[Hazel's honest-to-god really distracted by the floating piano, so he doesn't look to the side to wonder who the hell is making stupid cartoon noises at him until it's already been done. And then— oh. This guy, not looking like a homeless priest for once but still looking like a schlub. Iron that shirt, please, sir. It's embarrassing.]

—Mister Ukoku? [ennnh] Ya do always seem to know where to find me, huh? How are ya?

[Ignore the piano for ten seconds while Hazel gets control of his natural inclination to recoil and makes a polite face. Hi.]

[existentialcrisis]

[ He smiles at Hazel's expression. That answers that question—some time after their Seiten Taisei conversation, which is convenient. ]

I'm doing well, thank you. I like your temple better than mine. [ Would you mind if he crashed on the couch for a couple weeks? Just like old times!! ] This is yours, isn't it?

[churchbelle]

[Not at all, but only because there are like 13 bedrooms in this monster house and it would be easy to avoid him. Which sounds like a great idea, and yet, here's Hazel still standing there smiling. Aha...]

Sure as we're lookin' at it, it is. I'm thinkin' of givin' it a proper manor name. What do ya think?

[existentialcrisis]

Oh, I like it! That's a good idea. [ And he could go back and forth for a few minutes regarding what the name might be, but there are more interesting questions to ask. ]

Is your tall friend here? [ Gosh, what was his name? ]

[churchbelle]

[ennnnh]

Gat? [He has a name and you know he has a name, don't disrespect the only person who likes Hazel legitimately. Rude.] I'm afraid Gat hasn't been around, no. I reckon he'll be along eventually.

[add another item to the "upcoming rude awakenings in hazel's life" list]

[existentialcrisis]

[ Well, he was already dead. It'd be fitting. ]

That has been the pattern. People seem to come in with or after someone they know. You must have followed me! [ Hehe!! Who is your favorite creepy uncle though ]

[churchbelle]

[He doesn't want any creepy uncles tbh.....]

Did I now? Well, I don't mean to step on your toes, Mister Ukoku. I'm not in your space, am I?

[Where's your crib, uncle. Where should he not go.]

[existentialcrisis]

No, no, not at all. I'm glad you're here.

[ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Jesus Hazel invite him in. ]

Which god, by the way?

[churchbelle]

It's always good to see a familiar face. [Usually. Sometimes. Let's continue to talk out here in the yard.]

And come now, Mister Ukoku, are ya puttin' real value in that god business? I'm just a man, same as before.

[¯\_(ツ)_/¯ don't ask personal questions!!]

[existentialcrisis]

[ Uh-oh, prevarication is even cuter than straight answers! ]

Are you sure? What is this if not confirmation of the theory that everyone has a little piece of the divine in them?

[ (Same as before indeed.) ]

[churchbelle]

[fuq off ukoku]

Play-actin', plain and simple. But that's a matter of opinion, I s'pose.

[So he'll just continue to subtly disdain being told he's a useless, good-for-nothing god now just like all the other useless, good-for-nothing gods. Subtly to other people who don't have timeshares in the countryside of messing with his point of view. Subtly to those people.

Can't have everything.]

[existentialcrisis]

[ He laughs a little. ]

Well, I think most people here would agree. In theory, you could sit here in your manor— [ he nods at Hazel, politely acknowledging the term like one might indulge a child's impulse to give grandiose names to toys— ] and never do any of the things they supposedly expect you to.

[churchbelle]

[it is a MANSION shut up]

In theory. [...] Do ya like playin' God, Mister Ukoku?

[Like, he can hazard a guess, but tell him anyway.]

[existentialcrisis]

I haven't really done much playing God. [ aha...ha. ] Lots of other people are willing to do that; it's not hard. You kind of have to wonder why the heavenly administration felt they needed the help.

[churchbelle]

[Don't get him started!!]

Laziness? That ain't the one that's next to godliness, if I'm recallin' this right, but maybe times've changed.

[existentialcrisis]

What's closest to godliness here is materialism, I think. [ He's staring contemplatively at that piano. ] Think of all the faith that would just shrivel up and die if the world's religious communities knew who they were praying to.

[ A pause, and then, in a lighter tone: ]

I think they'd be happy to have you, though. Principled, compassionate, and you can help people in a way that no one else can. And you look the part!

[churchbelle]

[classic creepy uncle....]

You're gonna embarrass me, sir. I'd have my hands full day and night if folk were prayin' to me about that kinda thing.

[They won't, because that's not his apparent domain! Which still isn't an answer to the question of which god he is, but it eliminates a few others.]

Y'know, much like before.

[existentialcrisis]

You're not going to do it out of the goodness of your heart?

[ He doesn't even try to look surprised. ]

Well, I suppose it's different here. I haven't seen any evidence that monsters, or youkai, or what have you, exist.

[ Kind of a good idea, though. ]

[churchbelle]

[He can't be goaded about being a boy scout!! Go away.]

There're those other things— the spirits? They're a right nuisance, or so I've heard.

[existentialcrisis]

Ayakashi, yes.

[ He glances at Hazel for a second, inscrutable. ]

'Nuisance' is a good word for it. They don't seem to have the ability to problem-solve—or think, really. They gather in places where negative emotions are high, and if you're a god, they'll follow you around. That's all. I wouldn't even call them dangerous.

[churchbelle]

[But what about the blight... that seems dangerous.]

Are ya certain? Things don't just gather around a load of bad feelin' for no reason.

[existentialcrisis]

This is just based on my own observations; I'm sure those who've been here longer could tell you more. [ He waves that idea away: but those people are dumb, so. ] Ayakashi don't harm people directly. An individual has to be susceptible, first. Sort of like possession.

[churchbelle]

Possession doesn't sound dangerous to ya? [gee.... that's weird.] Sounds like a genuine form of harm to me.

[existentialcrisis]

Oh, I don't know. If nothing happens, is the victim really any worse off? There are people in the West who claim to be possessed by the Holy Spirit, aren't there?

[ Those tents were something else. ]