[open]

[churchbelle]

Who: Hazel and u
What: small priest is heckled by trees and literature
When: May 21~23 or so, flexible
Where: Far Shore places
Warnings: hazel and jae-ha have an active sex life
Summary: heckle

I. spooky trees
[It is what it sounds like: somewhere on the Far Shore, anywhere on the Far Shore, where Hazel is and where you, the witness, also happen to be, Hazel is making his way downtown around minding his own business like a man being followed. Or: he keeps looking over his shoulder, or stopping abruptly to look suddenly off to one side, or do all manner of things that look very much like he's trying to catch someone sneaking up on him.

But there isn't anyone there, because of course there isn't. Eventually, exasperated, he just comes to a natural stop and announces to the air:] Even the dang trees're nosy.

[have you ever been stalked by a spooky forest]


II. what kind of dewey decimal is this
[There's a library and new gods are being invited to come. That's enough for Hazel to finally nose around in there, after staying very much away from anything involving being within spitting distance of the old gods before now. He's a sight to behold when any individual old god passes by and expects a greeting, all manners and flattery and unpleasant looks the moment their backs are turned. He'd give them a rude gesture for the road, but that's far too improper for him.

But when he's not making childish faces at other gods' backs, he's trying to find... anything at all worthwhile in this place. There's nothing in order. It's a wreck. He can't find a single thing, and for all his practicing there are still plenty of kanji he's never seen before, so the older books in particular are brutal...

He pauses, picks a book up off a shelf, and frowns at it.] I can't even remember lookin' for this, it was so long ago.

[He has been here for Hours.]


III. wildcard
[hello what would you like to do? please ask and I can deliver]

Comments

[lilys_poise]

I sure do!

[She leans in and winks.]

Fair warning though, I'm a great hider. And I won't hold back.

[Mileage may vary]

[churchbelle]

[Oh boy... this will go places, he's sure.]

Are ya now? Well, I'm not so bad at this game myself. Why don't ya go hide first, and we'll see about these great skills.

[lilys_poise]

[So many places...]

Okay, here I go! Make sure you don't peek~

[She runs off toward the trees.]

[churchbelle]

[Okay




wait, she probably shouldn't go hide there.]

Wait, hold on—let's not play in the woods, miss.

[lilys_poise]

[She whirls around, surprised.]

Why not?

[And just in case he didn't notice.]

That's where all the good hiding places are.

[churchbelle]

Don't ya hear the sounds comin' outta there? Why don't we find a different bunch of trees, at least?

[lilys_poise]

Sounds?

[This is why you should always pay attention to your surroundings. She pauses to listen.]

Is there something out there? Like a tree monster? Or a ghost?

[Never mind that technically she's a ghost.]

[churchbelle]

Somethin' like that. Let's go play someplace else, shall we? If we can get ourselves far enough away from the tree monsters.

[Great idea, yes, let's go.]

[lilys_poise]

Sure.

[With a shrug, she heads back over to him.]

Although...

[Mischievous little smile...]

I've never seen a tree monster before. What do you think they're like?

[churchbelle]

I think they're powerfully dangerous and lil ladies like yourself shouldn't be goin' near 'em just for the thrill.

[Please...]

[lilys_poise]

They are? Have you seen one?

[He sounds well informed and the topic sure is exciting. Real live tree monsters! Elise doesn't even wait for an answer before she continues with her excited speculation.]

Did you fight it? Was it scary?

[churchbelle]

No, I ran away as fast as I could, on account of I don't wanna get strung up with roots.

[Obviously, this tree fight really happened, and he's not making this up at all.]

[lilys_poise]

They can tie you up with their roots?!

[Naturally this is nothing but complete truth. Elise glances nervously at the ground, as if expecting roots to come flying up at them any moment now.]

[churchbelle]

'Course they can. And they can blind ya with their leaves if you're careless, too.

[lilys_poise]

Gosh, that sounds really scary!

[So riveting.]

How did you ever escape?

[She imagines that it was very thrilling.]

[churchbelle]

Lots of runnin' and playin' with fire, of course. Trees don't play around with that kinda thing.

[lilys_poise]

Oh, wow! What a great idea! I bet trees hate fire.

[So clever and brave. Elise is completely wrapped up in the impressive battle she's imagining.]

What happened then? Did they all run away? Can trees run away?

[churchbelle]

'Course they did. They made like trees and leafed.

[MEGA ZING]

[lilys_poise]

[She looks surprised for half a second, then giggles.]

I guess their bark was worse than their bite!