Who prays to Angra Mainyu, honestly?

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Who: Zetta and Ross; Zetta and Hibiki?!
When: December 23 & 24
Where: The Near Shore
What: Zetta answers prayers. Ross comes along for one. Hibiki shows up for the other. Hilarity Ensues.

December 23.

What is it with forests, anyway?

[Zetta's divine power transports the pair of them -- or rather the three of them, if one counts the unfortunate minion on book-carrying detail -- down to the Near Shore in a flash of malign black energy that practically screams 'evil!'. As much as getting named a god is an incredible step down for him, Zetta has to appreciate that this particular divinity has a little style.]

[Find the blighted tree and investigate. Simple enough. Finding themselves deposited on the outskirts of a park, maybe less simple.]

...Okay, never mind. Not forests. Super. [Zetta scowls at the faint patch of winter-worn green, addressing Ross without looking his way.] This sounds way too easy to be easy, huh?

December 24.

Hyaaaha ha ha ha ha!

[Who is Zetta talking to? Because it isn't the minion that's lugging him up the walk to the neat little townhouse from which a heartfelt prayer had come. And there's no one else around to hear... But as an Overlord and protagonist, Zetta has a heartfelt obligation to narrate his life.]

This is perfect! A prayer to watch TV? I'll sit back, do nothing, and have another devoted follower spreading the good word... uh, bad word... without needing to so much as flip a page.

I sure hope it's some decent show, though... [A brief expression of worry crossed his face as the minion shifted the Sacred Tome to one arm, the better to access the bell. But hey, what's the worst that could happen on this prayer?]

Comments

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[One does.]

[With the greatest of fortune, though, it is the one that actually speaks -- the bloblike dog that follows the villains around and constantly comments on how idiotic the two are being. Right now he's attempting to point out how ridiculous it is for the two of them to try to fool a Kepomon into loving them when they both have few to no redeemable traits and virtues.]

[As for the tea? Earl Grey.]

[...it was what was in the kitchen.]

[priforprince]

[ Whew. She is safe to sip. And then blink, surprised - but not disappointed. ]

Ah....

[ ....This is almost up to standards. Hibiki suddenly has a better opinion of Zetta's minion than she does of Zetta. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[And Zetta's minions certainly aren't semi-sentient extensions of himself, so it's all good.]

[Zetta, meanwhile, is watching the budding climax with a growing frown.]

Aww, crap, this is a series where we villains lose, don't we.

[Zetta thinks Hibiki is a villain.]

[priforprince]

Don't disrespect broadcasting ethics.

[ Zetta is about two seasons too late for his assessment of Hibiki to be accurate, alas. But it's still an understandable assumption.

And, for the record, any story in which the villains win is Doing It Wrong and should be taken off the air immediately. A story in which the villains win in addition to selling toys of animals that speak in nothing but sentence enders....

That is an abomination too great to fathom. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[She's 100% a villain, damn it! He'll argue this to the end of time!]

It sure doesn't teach kids a valuable lesson about life. They'll go out there thinking you can win with that level 6 Monopede because you believed in it.

[priforprince]

Don't confuse the noblest cause triumphing with statistical impossibilities.

[ Hibiki has been on the losing side of a few of those statistical impossibilities

BUT SHE'D RATHER NOT THINK ABOUT THAT, TIME TO THINK ABOUT HERSELF INSTEAD

PYU...AMORE LOVE...~ ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Hmph. Nobility is in the eye of the beholder. For example, there's no more noble cause than getting me my damn body back.

[This is of course objectively true! But Zetta regards Hibiki for her inevitable dismissal of this fact, so she can basically make his point for him.]

[priforprince]

[ Hibiki sniffs, almost amused but mostly disdainful. ] Such a--

[ But it's then that Kepachu comes to the rescue of his friends.

Please hold while we turn to stone. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Zetta himself is infuriated by the confrontation he sees before him on the screen, but for far different reasons.]

Oh come on! How did he manage to set a water creature on FIRE by attacking its horn?!

[priforprince]

[ Hibiki, recovering by listening to Zetta for a moment (a dire strait, indeed) pulls out a full riot shield and places it on the floor in front of her. She swallows, hunkering down.

The episode. Must be. Almost over. She can do this.......

As long as her shield isn't shattered by especially gratuitous sentence enders, she'll be safe. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Zetta... finds absolutely nothing wrong with this at all.]

[That is probably even worse of a dire strait, that he finds common ground in inventories that aren't in any way reflected on a person.]

[The episode begins to wind up with lessons learned and friendships made, and only some gratuitous 'chus' thrown in, if not in volume. And then -- it transitions to challenging the viewer to sing a song featuring the names of all 188 Kepomon.]

[priforprince]

[ There is a cracking noise from this side of the couch.

Then a splintering one.

Then glass goes flying everywhere and some sort of dead weight hits the back of the couch with such force that it flips up and over the back, to collapse in a pile behind said couch.

It's probably nothing. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

Huh.

[Zetta blinks, which seems a reasonable reaction to a couple dozen fragments of riot shield now embedded in his cover in spine.]

It's a good thing that was probably nothing, or this would really hurt.

[priforprince]

[ The kid claps and goes to change the disc, somehow having emerged unscathed.

If more Kepomon is played tonight, however, it shall not be witnessed by Shikyoin Hibiki. She has exited, leaving only this crumpled pile of purple fabric, silver hair, and....

Oh. Oh, god. She's a rug. ]

[badassfreakingoverlord]

[Out of sight, out of mind.]

[Luckily (for Hibiki's follower count), the kid barely even notices she's missing. It's enough to shout about all Kepomon things and be heard by SOMEONE.]

[Even Zetta's eyes have glazed over by the time dinner is almost ready and responsible children need to set the table.]

[priforprince]

[ Lucky them. Nobody notices the new accessory, either.

What an incredibly successful prayer. ]