thenearshore | [closed] forward is whichever way you're facing

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[closed] forward is whichever way you're facing

Who: Shun and Ren
When: Around January 22nd-23rd
Where: Mostly the Near Shore, probably
What: Shun just lost his exemplar and longest-standing shinki. He handles this about as well as he generally handles losing people close to him, but hey, at least he's inviting his boyfriend on his ayakashi-murdering rage bender this time.

[It's been eight months since Shun lost a shinki. He knows, because the day he lost Joker was the day he named Fubuki, off the back of both of them having lost their partner at the same time. He'd been meaning to do better since then, tried to do what he could to make his intentions clear...but if anything, he'd done even worse with Fubuki than he had with Joker, to the point he's surprised Fubuki didn't just ask for his name to be revoked by the end. And the less said about the mess he'd made with Reisi in the interim, the better.

Even having Fubuki ask for his name revoked would be better than this, though. The day starts with Shun waking up to an abrupt feeling of loss, one of four ties severed. It very nearly continues the same way it did when Yuto disappeared, in blindly throwing himself into work and refusing to allow any help that isn't absolutely necessary, but as he scrolls through the contact list to make certain of which of his shinki it is that's vanished - it's definitely Fubuki, the name is as gone as the feeling of their connection - he comes back up to a particular name. One who had gotten particularly upset about his disastrous reaction to Yuto's disappearance.

After a good minute of staring at the phone, Shun lets out a bracing sigh and taps the screen to call Ren, almost reluctantly bringing the speaker up to his ear. He'll just have to hope he actually answers it this early in the morning...]

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[Ren isn't actually awake this early in the morning, and he would usually try to ignore the ringing that woke him up and go back to sleep--but it's Shun's ringtone. Shun is one of the two people who he wouldn't ignore anyway (along with Eric), but especially this early, it's probably because something is wrong. Shun wouldn't call just to tell him about some nice dream he had or a kitten he passed on the street.

Ren pushes himself up so he won't be mumbling into his pillow and snatches his phone off the nightstand, doing his best not to sound too much like he just woke up when he answers it.]

Morning~ You're not bleeding, are you?

[Shun knows Ren's sleeping habits well enough to know he definitely would've woken him up regardless of how much he might be trying to sound like he didn't. He does manage to give a somewhat half-hearted snort in response to the greeting, though.]

Probably wouldn't have called for that. [If it was life-threatening enough, it'd be better to just call Hakkai upfront and deal with that disaster.

He lets out a rather sharp breath through his teeth a moment later, though - Ren might be familiar with the sound of him bracing himself to say something unpleasant.] Fubuki is gone.

[He sounds tired, but not in the sense of just having woken up.]

[Not bleeding, but not something good if that sound is anything to go by.

And sure enough, it's not. His stomach seems to drop like a lead weight, and he's silent for a moment while he fights the urge to just curl back up under his covers and declare today officially cancelled.]

Oh. [Then more silence, while he shifts so he's actually sitting up properly, one arm curled around his knees. He's pretty sure that's going to sink in more in half an hour when he's actually awake, but it hurts more than enough right now as it is.

But while he'd liked Fubuki, he wasn't they one who had been living with him for months now. He can't imagine how Shun must be feeling.]

...Should I come over?

[It's...almost easier, not actually having to see Ren's face while he's doing this. Shun still remembers how crushed he'd looked about Yuto. Still, the tone says enough, really, and it definitely makes him want even less to obligate Ren to anything in the wake of it.

Still...

He rubs the heel of his hand against his forehead.] I can come to you if you want. [A pause.] I was going to go out. To take my mind off things.

[He's usually a bit more straightforward than that, but he's sure Ren is familiar with his usual method of taking his mind off things by now.] I remember you got upset that I didn't call you last time.

[Perhaps it's the nature of the break he'd had with Fubuki in the last month or so before his disappearance that's made Shun that little bit more considerate this time.]

You don't have to come here. I'll just be getting dressed. [Granted, if Shun wants to watch him get dressed, it's not like he'd be opposed to that, but he'd be surprised if Shun is in the mood. But he does also sound like he's only saying it because it's the thing to say.

And Shun might end up wanting to come anyway, given what else he has to say.] I'm glad you called me this time. I'll come with you.

[To be frank, he was upset last time because they'd already sort of had that conversation before and also Shun could have really used someone who wouldn't let him get covered in blight--just like Shun wasn't going to let him get covered in blight either. But also, he would have really liked to have gotten to beat up a bunch of ayakashi. Shun's idea of beating up a bunch of stuff when he's upset isn't that bad, as long as he isn't hurting himself too much and beating up something that needed to be dealt with anyway.

So he's going. He would also very much like to destroy a few ayakashi instead of moping because another friend is gone. He's already sliding out of bed to find something to wear.]

[Shun moves to do the same thing almost as soon as Ren offers to come with him. On one hand, he still feels somewhat like he shouldn't have needed to...on the other, maybe it'll help Ren to some degree too.] You take longer to wake up than me, so me coming over there after I get ready gives you extra time. I'll have to go wake up Kotori as well.

[Granted, she's probably just about awake anyway - this is around Shun's usual morning patrol time, and she's generally the one who comes with him - but it's probably best not to make any assumptions when they're going to be fighting.

This is about the time when any normal person would probably thank Ren for going that far out of his way, but Shun being Shun, there's a brief pause before the somewhat awkward, if genuine, addition of:] I appreciate the help.

[How do words about feelings work, he still doesn't really know.]

[Ren takes the phone from his ear to stare at it for a moment, like if he stares blankly enough, Shun will sense it somehow. He'd assumed that Shun had called him after getting ready and maybe after thinking about whether he should for all that time. He a little surprised that Shun must have called him right after waking up and discovering someone was missing.

Eventually, he remembers that Shun can't see him and he can't hear if Shun says anything else, and also the rest of that statement was important too. He puts the phone back up to his ear and turns off the path to his closet to head out of the room instead.] Mmm, I should probably wake up some of my shinki too...

[Of course, Shun can't manage a "thank you", but Ren has long since stopped expecting one. He shows his gratitude in other ways. And anyway, that was kind of like a thank you.] Well, I can't let you go out and keep all the fun to yourself, can I~?

[The lengthy pause while Ren stares at the phone is somewhat telling even if Shun can't actually see what he's doing, and he's about to remark on it when Ren apparently realises that he's doing something not particularly communicative and comes back on.

Shun's heading down the stairs at this point, trying not to linger too long on the doorway to what was Fubuki's bedroom as he passes.]

Considering how much you fussed about the condition I came back in last time, I don't know if this would count as "fun" even by your standards.

[It's...a vague attempt at maintaining the humour of the question, though Shun's feeling it even less than usual this morning.]

[Well, he's not entirely wrong, but Ren has a reputation to maintain here. And also it's nice that he can get Shun to play along a bit even though he must be feeling awful and not at all like joking around.]

Hmm, if you really think that, you must not know me as well as I thought~

[He doesn't have very far to go before he reaches his first shinki's room, and he knocks on the door loudly enough to wake him up and also probably to be heard through the phone. While he waits for Michiya to come to the door, his attitude sobers somewhat.]

I'll try to get ready quickly, so you won't have to wait too long.

If you enjoy seeing me in that condition that much, I could always go alone. [That's toned slightly more obviously as humour just to be sure Ren knows he's not being serious, but it's a pretty morbid joke even so. Then again, Shun's kind of used to making those types of morbid observations.

Shun makes it to Kotori's room not long after, tapping fairly gently on her door given his suspicion that she's already awake.] I was planning to walk over anyway, so that'll give you some extra time.

[It'll give him a chance to decide where on the grounds to put another memorial, too.]

Well, we did have a lot of fun last time when you did that~ [Good thing his boyfriend is just as if not even more okay with the morbid humor. Of course, it's somewhat of a coping mechanism for him.

Michiya was definitely not already awake, and for a moment while he's standing the hall waiting, Ren wishes that Shun had already been ready and was going to just teleport right here right now. But there's no helping it, so he pushing that feeling away for later.]

Okay. I'll try to be ready when you get here.

[...Well, he's not wrong, but Shun's response is somewhat dry.] I don't usually plan for that sort of ending when I go out and get injured.

[He definitely hadn't been planning it that day, it had just sort of...happened as soon as they got into the hot spring. He supposes they'd both needed distracting, on top of everything else that had been building up to it.

That said, they probably aren't going to have a very effective time getting ready if they're both still on the phone, and Shun gives a faint sound of agreement.] I'll be there soon, then.

[They sure aren't. Ren considers saying something else, but in the end just hangs up. Anything else he might want to say he can say in person or, probably, not at all.

By the time Shun gets there, Ren is waiting in his room, almost ready except for the last step of pulling on his fight gloves. He's in usual outfit of black coat, red shirt, black pants and skirt, with his brace of water guns strapped on under his coat and the knife Shun gave him for his birthday tucked into a pocket. Instead of his usual choker, though, he picked another present, the black lace one.

Michiya is waiting quietly nearby, playing with a couple of cats and a stick toy, while Sakuya is putting the finishing touches on braiding Ren's ponytail and securing it into a bun on the back of his head. Ren waves a little when Shun appears outside but dutifully stays put while Sakuya finishes sticking pins in his hair.]

[As promised, Shun doesn't take very long before he shows up on Ren's balcony. Kotori instead elects to wait at ground level for the moment, considering her outfit isn't all that conducive to balcony-jumping. Despite the morose mood of the day - or perhaps because of it - he's just as meticulously prepared as usual, with the few extra knives people had gotten him as presents recently added to his already quite ridiculous arsenal.

Plus an extra canteen of blessed water. Apparently one way to make Shun less spartan about healing supplies is to just come along with him.

Shun doesn't really have a problem with waiting for him to finish, simply leaning against the balcony edge as he waits. There's something rather restless about his bearing, but the overall downward cast to it is perhaps a bit more noticeable.]

[Once Sakuya is done, Ren shakes his head vigorously to make sure his hair is going to stay in place. She looks somewhat relieved when it does and Ren gives her a bright smile of thanks. A couple of flashes of light later, Ren is walking out onto the balcony with a poleaxe in hand and a red cape over his shoulders.

He comes to a stop next to Shun and looks like he'd probably give him a hug if not for the poleaxe but takes one of his hands to squeeze it lightly instead. He also looks like he isn't quite sure what to say--mostly because there's a lot that could be said but Shun might not appreciate much of it--but eventually settles on something small.]

I'm sorry.

Edited 2018-09-28 02:27 (UTC)

[Shun pushes himself straight again when Ren comes out, eying him briefly - he has technically seen Sakuya's vessel form before, but he hadn't really been in a state to properly consider it. He returns the gesture when Ren squeezes his hand, figuring Ren's probably going to be trying to put the focus on him in this situation, and moves forward slightly to lean his head on Ren's for a moment to bypass the poleaxe issue.]

You don't have anything to apologise for. [It's not a dismissive remark, though - it's pretty clear he understands the intent behind the remark, he just doesn't want Ren to put more on himself than he needs to.] I suppose I should consider myself lucky it lasted this long.

[He doesn't sound particularly convinced of that himself, though, and especially at this particular timing...]

[Ren sighs fondly and shakes his head a little against Shun's.] I'm not apologizing for me...

[He's pretty sure Shun knows that...but not 100% sure, so he feels like he should say it anyway.]

He was here for a long time, wasn't he? [Ren can't help but squeeze Shun's hand again, a little more like he's clinging to give himself support this time. Thinking about how long Fubuki had been here really just makes it worse, and not just because they'd gotten the chance to be friends for that long. It's a reminder that no one is really safe, no matter how long they've been here, and he doesn't like thinking about that at all.]

I wish you could have parted on better terms.

[Ren has found the core of the problem there, and Shun's fingers clench slightly at the mention of parting on better terms. Even if he wasn't sure he would have been able to bridge that divide, there's definitely a part of him that's going to be wondering if he could have, given the chance.

Eventually, he just lets out a very long, very tired breath.] I don't know if that's going to be true of any of my shinki at this point. I haven't had much of a record before now, either.

[Joker had been...well, they hadn't been on bad terms, but he's not quite sure they ever surpassed that point of Joker putting him on a pedestal. Reisi and Shun are on somewhat delicate terms already, Kotori can't disappear, and Chinatsu is probably the first one to have benefited from Shun recognising a pattern.]

I don't know that he wouldn't have put himself in danger from me if we'd gone on much longer. [Fubuki had been...not entirely prying, but getting a little too short with Shun about concealing information for any reason. Including information about Duel Monsters. He doesn't really want to know how that would have ended, if he's being honest.]

[Ren tilts his head a little in thought.] Chinatsu-san still seems happy with you. And Munakata-san helped a lot with your party, so he must still like you that much.

[He gets the point, but he's not going to let Shun think he's been absolutely terrible for his shinki without some protest. Shun may not be the easiest person to get along with, but he always wanted what was best for his shinki. Even if unfortunately, that sometimes meant something frustrating for them.]

You could have always sent him to me if it got that far. [Then he realizes how that sounds and quickly adds:] --Just to talk about it. But I guess there's no way of knowing if I could have been persuasive enough either.

[Shun hasn't talked all that much about the major cause for his concern with Reisi, so despite the reassurance, he lets out a slight hiss through his teeth.]

It's less obvious with Munakata. And Chinatsu's been around the shortest time, so maybe I've learnt my lesson by now.

[He screwed up with Munakata around the time he named her, and that had been a significant slap to his senses. It's hard to be sure whether he would've been any safer talking to Ren either, and Shun shakes his head slightly.]

Not sure. He seemed pissed off with the idea that I was hiding anything from him, even if I was being as honest as I could be without endangering him, so he might've done the same with you. [He grimaces slightly, hesitating before he continues.] It took me a while to tell him about what happened to Johan, since they were from the same world and he knew that.

[Fifth time's the charm...? That sounds pretty awful, though, he's not going to say that.

He sighs a little and shakes his head too. If he ever finds out who decided it was a good idea to bring people from the same place and make some of gods and some shinki, he was really going to make that person regret it.]

Ah. I think I would have told him about that, if I'd known they were friends here. But I can see how that would be a difficult situation. Although with how freely so many people like to talk about it on the BBS, I'm amazed it isn't more of an issue, to be honest.

[He shifts, somewhat agitated by it even being a thing shinki could be aware of and worried about, but also like he might be subconsciously trying to shield his shinki from this conversation somehow. Not that he thinks there's much danger in soulless shinki starting to question things if they hear too much, but...it's still not something he really wants to risk.]

I didn't tell him while the investigation was going on, since I figured he'd try to get himself tangled up in it. [And the murderer had been a very credible threat. Shun had allowed Reisi to involve himself to some degree on the basis that Shun knew him to be plenty powerful enough to take care of himself, but Fubuki had been out of the question.] After that, he...always seemed to be having issues with memories, or guilt over other things, or something else. He'd get annoyed about me turning down his help, but refuse to let me help him when I offered.

[...All things considered, that part had been going on for a while. He doesn't miss Ren's discomfort about the subject of shinki and gods sharing worlds, though, and he doesn't necessarily disagree with the remark made, honestly.]

I suppose people have probably figured out what's safe and what isn't by now, but sometimes it still feels a little careless.

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[closed] forward is whichever way you're facing

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