Of course you know, this means war. [1 Open/2 Closed]

[subconmodo]

Who: Snatcher and you, Snatcher and Hat Kid, and Snatcher and anyone at Apollo's Temple
When: Near the end of February
Where: Around
What: Snatcher has found out a horrible, horrible truth. Engage Petty Mode+



[He'd had Jeremy check three times. Three. Times.]

[He'd looked online.]

[By some terrible, horrible twist of fate, Hibiki Shikyoin wasn't kidding. She was actually somewhat successful. That haughty, stuck-up, bratty pretty boy actually had one up on him. HIM! Why the HECK was someone like THAT better than HIM?!]

[They weren't. That was how. And he was going to make sure Hibiki knew it.]

[Let the games begin.]



A: Egg. (Open)



[All around the city, stores have been running out of eggs. There one moment, gone the next. Smaller businesses have reported someone leaving money, but the larger grocery chains? Nothing. Zilch. Nada. It's a mystery]

[Or it would be. If Snatcher and his minion weren't wandering around with a couple of wagons carefully stacked with cartons of eggs.]

All right. I think we've almost got enough. The store down the street should have everything we need. Let's go!





B: Death Wish (Closed to Hat Kid)



[Scene: A dark room somewhere in Subcon Weald. A single table stands illuminated by a single lamp, putting a spotlight on Hat Kid and Snatcher, sitting at the table]

All right, kiddo. You know why I've brought you here.

[He slides the contract over, face down, his eyes narrowed.]

And this one won't even cost you your life.




C: Attack on Apollo (Closed to residents of Apollo's Temple)



[It's a beautiful day. The sun's shining, the weather's finally reaching edging past the chill of winter into Spring, the flowers are starting to bloom...]

[And an egg sails through the air to splatter against the wall of Apollo's Temple.]

[It's a two-pronged attack, with Jeremy taking one side and Snatcher on the other, darting between goats and flower beds to launch egg after egg at what Snatcher can only think of as the worst theme park attraction in existence.]

[He's doing Hibiki a favor by helping her redecorate, really.]

Comments

B

[hattersgonnahat]

[Was he even capable of giving contracts that don't involve death?]

...Then what is the catch this time? [She may be hopeful, but she's not that stupid.]

[subconmodo]

The catch is that I want you to do what you do best... to someone else.

[He slides forward a photo of Hibiki. Probably the easiest thing to find in the world]

I want you to annoy the ever-loving HECK out of this guy. Whatever you have in your arsenal, go for it, kid. I want the pretty boy to suffer.

[hattersgonnahat]

Really? That's all?

[That seems....simple. A little too simple.]

[There had to be something more to this. For all the times that Snatcher had tried to kill her, there's no way he had something else in mind.]

[...Oh right, didn't he always say that she needed to get better at negotiating upfront?]

Wait, what am I getting out of this?

[subconmodo]

[He snaps his fingers to reveal... a magical girl outfit. Well crafted, hand sewed, and made to match her umbrella in blues and yellows.]

This. As long as you keep your mouth shut about me being involved with this contract of ours.

[hattersgonnahat]

[ -! Wow, he even had one ready!]

[...Though wait a second. Gonna have to look it over more closely before deciding. It's not... bad, but it's not really good either. Judging by her face so far she doesn't seem all too impressed.]

[subconmodo]

[...She's kidding.]

[Does she even know how hard he worked on that?! How complicated some of that was?! All those hats HAVE to have eaten her brain. It's the only thing he can think of.]

[Brat wouldn't know fashion if it smacked her in the face.]

All right, fine. Going to play hardball, eh? Sit back down, kiddo. I've got one more prize for you--but you've got to complete two specific tasks in this contract to get it.

[He pulls out a box. Not an expensive one. Not in the slightest. It's one of those craft-store boxes. The kind that you get for a buck and are meant to be decorated all fancy. Snatcher didn't have time for that. He just wanted one with a latch]

[He puts a hand on top]

So what'll it be first? The tasks or the prize?

[hattersgonnahat]

[....Oh really.]

[She reeeeeaaaally wanted to see what was in the box first. And it's so tempting. Had it being anyone else but the soul stealing lawyer ghost...]

[Sigh, restraint was hard.]

What's the task first?

[subconmodo]

Two of them.

[He holds up one finger.]

First one: you find any and all posters advertising movies this jerk is starring in and draw on them. In permanent marker. Mustaches, stupid glasses, whatever that demented little mind of yours can think of.

Two:

[he holds up a second finger and a sign floats behind him. It's a simple thing. With neon green posterboard and large, block letters in all capitals that say "YOU SMELL"]

You photobomb while holding this sign at every opportunity you can.

C, also i am not late, not by GENIUS TIME

[priforprince]

[ What a beautiful day! Enjoying a cup of tea, Hibiki idly instructed the nearest spygoat to draw back the curtains. After all, the sun is her dominion, and with the curtains in the way, she can't look at herself in the window....

She takes a deep breath, enjoying the day's brightness and the way the sunlight catches in her eyes, reflected in the windowpane -

And then an egg smashes right where she'd been looking.

It's amazing how one little cup breaking can echo this much. Even outside. ]

[subconmodo]

[As the gooey, golden yolk of that thrown egg slides down the window, obscuring Hibiki's face from view, Snatcher thinks he finally understands what's so appealing about Heaven. It's right there, a perfect moment that couldn't have gone better if he'd planned it.]

[Not that he's dumb enough to stick around. He's barely touched his stash!]

[The bushes rustle as he dashes to the next hiding place, tossing three more eggs at the side of the temple, holding back laughter the whole time]

[priforprince]

[ Hibiki's eyebrow twitches as she watches the egg drip down. Had whoever'd thrown that been waiting, or was it merely ill fortune...?

Wait, is that the sound of splattering from the next room over?

From inside the temple, Snatcher might hear a commotion, as if someone tried to powerwalk from one room to another but the collective ghost of smashed teacups and one eviscerated chair (don't ask) decided to literally pull the rug out from beneath her. There is also a fancy shiny "shing!" sound effect as if that same person, who suffered a rug-pulling, caught themselves fancily at the last second.

As if, mind you. Anything could be happening in here! ]

[subconmodo]

[Ah, the sweet sounds of mass chaos--or the seeds of it to be planted. Only one thing to do for this: keep leading whoever's inside along and see what ELSE he can get them to run into!]

[And if he so happens to get a little sloppier at hiding himself in his petty glee, he hasn't noticed it yet.]

[priforprince]

Again?!

[ There's egg on THIS WINDOW, TOO?! And now the noise is coming from THE NEXT ROOM?!?!?!?!

Hibiki can see a pattern when one develops in front of her. She hurries to one room further down from where she'd last heard smashing noises, wrestles with the window, and finally gets it open. (Take that, window. When she first got here, she didn't know how to open these. But genius can do anything.)

This victory achieved, the yelling commences. ]

OI! IS THIS ANY WAY TO HANDLE DAIRY PRODUCTS?!?!?!

[subconmodo]

[There's a brief moment where he wonders if this might be a trap.]

[The question is quickly suppressed by an urge to split into three and lob a bunch of eggs at Hibiki all at once.]

OOPS! CLUMSY ME!

[Once that's out there in whatever the triple version of stereo is, the two other Snatchers disappear, leaving one to wield a veritable tornado of slowly spinning eggs above his head.]

I MEANT TO THROW MORE! AHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA!

[priforprince]

Your boredom is beyond the pale. How DARE you amuse your pitiful brain by disturbing my morning!

[ A goat - a real goat, not a spy one - wanders up and starts nomming the raw egg off the side of Hibiki's temple. Food!

For her own part, Hibiki refuses to be intimidated by Snatcher's splitting trick. She has things to say, and they Will Be Said! ]

If you're so intent on breaking eggs, creating the world's largest quiche is best!!

[subconmodo]

What was that?! You want your house to become a quiche? Weird request, but all right!

[Behold. MORE EGGS. And food for the goats]

[nopixiedust]

[Wendy swears, she can never have a calm day.]

[The goats are all bleating in alarm at the bizarre intrusion upon the grounds of the temple, and, well, panicked goats is definitely one sort of way to get Wendy's attention. She peers carefully from behind some thick velvet curtains, expecting maybe another natural disasters... but, no, it's just a pair of jackasses. Sure, very shadowy and menacing jackasses... but that's hardly any different from a regular ayakashi.]

[Somehow, she has a feeling this is Hibiki's fault.]

[Well, there's only one way to find out. Sneaking out when she's sure that Shadow Supreme and Shadow Stooge aren't in the area, she hustles over to the main road so that she can straighten out her dress a little bit. With everything put in order, she comes around as if she's just showing up, and claps her hands together.]

[Like many small children (or people who think they're small children), she's a master at delighted innocence.]

Oh! Wow, sir! What are you doing?

[subconmodo]

[He stops mid-throw, face falling as he realizes that he's been caught. At least it's just some brat--is what he'd say if brats didn't end up being a thorn in his side more often than not.]

Giving someone their just desserts.

[He goes ahead and tosses the egg anyway. Brat or no, he's a ghost on a mission.]

You can either join in or scram, kid.

[nopixiedust]

[If she were a mind reader, Wendy would applaud him on his caution. That's the right way to respond to kids, in any kind of situation. For now, however, she clasps her hands together.]

That sounds like a lot of fun, so, sure! If I can borrow some of your eggs, anyway. It's not like I carry any with me!

So what'd they do, anyway?

[subconmodo]

[He hesitates a moment. He'd thought she'd be put off and run somewhere, but it looks like this kid has the same particular brand of "precociousness" as Hat Kid.]

...Fine. Take these and stay where I can see you.

[He shoves three into her hands, then picks up two for himself and lobs them.]

It's not about what the pretty boy in there does. It's how he acts.

[Toss]

Like he's better than me.

[Toss]

When he's not.

[nopixiedust]

[Wow, three eggs, all for her lil' ol' hands. This is a lot of responsibility for a girl. Wendy tries to adjust them in her hands as she watches his own eggs go flying.]

Wow! So he just acted cocky, is that it?

[Because, yeah, that sounds like Hibiki, all right. And this really isn't working for her... Without thinking too hard, she tosses one egg up into the air, followed by another. Not towards the temple, just... up in the air.]

[Don't mind her as she casually starts juggling. It just feels like the thing to do.]

[subconmodo]

There's more to it than that. [Like the fact that she's actually successful.] But if you want to boil it down to the bare bones then sure.

[He tosses a few more eggs before catching her juggling out of the corner of his eye]

What in the world are you doing?

1/3

[nopixiedust]

Listen, it's not my fault you gave me more than I could hold, so I had to-

2/3

[nopixiedust]

[A pause, and she more properly takes in what she's doing even as she doesn't stop.]

3/3

[nopixiedust]

Oh! I can juggle!

[She didn't realize that was a thing she could do. Acrobatics, sure, but that's something else entirely.]