♥ watanuki kimihiro 四月一日君尋 (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
cleanmemory) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
thenearshore2016-09-18 02:01 am
cleanmemory) wrote in thenearshore2016-09-18 02:01 am
Entry tags:
[ closed ] You Can't Follow Your Heart
Who: Jade Curtiss and Watanuki Kimihiro
What: SERIOUS TALKING I GUESS
When: Evening, April 24th
Where: Guanyin's Temple
Warnings: TBD
Zero had left, but Watanuki was still feeling incredibly shaken up. He had somehow managed to hold it together in front of the silver-haired shinki, but now that he was gone, Watanuki was feeling the wall he had built around himself in the heat of the moment slowly crumbling.
With scraped palms and a thumb still bleeding, he dragged himself back inside of the temple from where the confrontation had happened, just beyond the doors. Underneath his yukata, his legs were shaking. He felt as if they would fold under him at any moment. His breath was shaky. He wasn't sure if he'd make it to the housing portion.
But all the while as he walked through the courtyard, Zero's words kept playing over in his head:
You... and the other gods, you really are incapable of understanding the loss we've been forced to endure for you, can you?
Watanuki paused by a statue. The god finally lowered himself, down on his haunches. He was bent over, in front of a statue of what was supposed to be him--a god draped with fine linens and a carefree, lounging pose. But he didn't feel that way. He didn't feel carefree.
And there, he started crying.
What: SERIOUS TALKING I GUESS
When: Evening, April 24th
Where: Guanyin's Temple
Warnings: TBD
Zero had left, but Watanuki was still feeling incredibly shaken up. He had somehow managed to hold it together in front of the silver-haired shinki, but now that he was gone, Watanuki was feeling the wall he had built around himself in the heat of the moment slowly crumbling.
With scraped palms and a thumb still bleeding, he dragged himself back inside of the temple from where the confrontation had happened, just beyond the doors. Underneath his yukata, his legs were shaking. He felt as if they would fold under him at any moment. His breath was shaky. He wasn't sure if he'd make it to the housing portion.
But all the while as he walked through the courtyard, Zero's words kept playing over in his head:
You... and the other gods, you really are incapable of understanding the loss we've been forced to endure for you, can you?
Watanuki paused by a statue. The god finally lowered himself, down on his haunches. He was bent over, in front of a statue of what was supposed to be him--a god draped with fine linens and a carefree, lounging pose. But he didn't feel that way. He didn't feel carefree.
And there, he started crying.
no subject
"He's completely rogue and I have no idea who his god is, but he was ill and no one could figure out what was wrong with him..." And he lifted his hand. "So I decided I could try and use my powers to see if I could read, him, and find out anything wrong--
"And I did! I found out he's not even human! He's sick because he needs to eat people's blood to live and he doesn't know that and I can't even tell him! If he finds out things about him it's bad and... and he wanted me to tell him... he wanted me to tell him so badly that he started making himself even more sick because he was fighting whatever we're fighting in regards to people finding out stuff about him and then he just snapped and went full on monster and he was going to eat me but he didn't he just threw himself out of psycho-mode and I was finally able to let him know that he had to eat these pills they're like blood pills but they don't look like blood they're all white and stuff but I got him to take them and then he blamed me for being insensitive for not telling him what was wrong but it's not like I want to keep it from him, but he told me I don;t understand how he feels and I have no right to keep his past from him but trying to tell him even made me feel crazy so I couldn't now, now I don't know what to do or how to feel except REALLY REALLY UPSET!"
And in all one breath, there it was.
no subject
"Did that...just happen here?"
no subject
Sniff.
no subject
He pulled his hands out of his pockets and gestured in tandem with shaking his head signifying that there wasn't much to be done at that moment after everything had happened.
"My Lord, tell me: What exactly do you need me for? And I already know about answering prayers. Any shinki can do that. What exactly do you need me for?"
1/2
So on this, with someone who was tied to him, bound to him by name, he had to do his answer justice. Had to think before saying, because it was more than just about him now. He had a shinki. He was a god. He was a god, and the realization hit him like a ton of bricks then, for once, he had just been a lowly servant to a woman who was like a god to him, but now... he had somehow become a creature above even her.
'There is no such thing as coincidence,' Yuuko would always say, and those words had him studying Jade carefully. 'There is only...'
'My Lord, tell me: what exactly do you need me for?'
2/2
Things like him. Decoys. Inhuman. Clones. Placeholders of people, many of which died in Jade's quest to find... what could he call it? Happiness? Solace? Truth? Forgiveness?
Jihiki. The name he had given him, a pardon from buddha, something he now was, would be, until his time ended here, if it ever ended. It wasn't a name he picked due to happenstance, it was chosen. The name was inevitable. And so where they, thrust together, a man who was essentially a god of creation to clones, and now overseen by him, a god who was a clone. No coincidence. None whatsoever.
"That's not the right question," He finally answered, and he shook his head, mismatched eyes looking up at Jade, bright as the sun finally sank behind the horizon, giving way to darkness. "...You weren't bestowed upon me because I needed a weapon, or a servant, or anything like that. It happened because it was inevitable.
"I've seen what you cannot... and I know, just from that alone you and I are bound together... that it was destiny that you and I met on this plane. It would have been impossible, in any other circumstance, except this one." There was a pause... but he did continue.
"I don't need you for anything. Not a task, not protection... that's just a duty that comes with you being my shinki. But I don't need you for anything.
"...I just need you."
no subject
What does that mean? I just need you. It was too abstract. It was nothing that he could immediately research or do anything about.
An incident had happened in this very temple without his knowledge or use. His god was hurt because he hadn't summoned him.
But perhaps he shouldn't worry about that. Maybe whatever Watanuki decided to do right under his nose was his prerogative as a god. Perhaps it was none of his business if he wanted to haphazardly help a monstrous lost soul.
Jade felt that it was a selfish notion that he just wanted him because of whatever this "destiny" was, but who was he to question "destiny" or "gods"?
"I see..." he replied softly. "Well then, do be more careful with lost souls. Not all of them will be as easy going as myself" And that's all he had to offer.
no subject
Would that make the other feel better? To be given a focus, something to work for, instead of just being forced to blindly follow? He had seen how Jade researched and he had stayed up so long in order to learn more about the world. Should he give him more to learn? More to bury himself in?
Would that make him happy? And of what he saw from Jade's past... was the other capable of happiness? Or was that his job, as a god? To allow him to find it?
That's what had him blurting out the next part.
"You turn into a spear," He stated. "I don't know anything about combat.
"...Will you learn spear techniques... and teach me how to use you?"
no subject
"Yes. I can certainly do that. We'll need something to practice with, however."
no subject
"...I'm sure if we look around this place we could find something. I haven't gotten around to clearing out the storage units in the back. Maybe we could find things there."
no subject
"YouTube seems fairly useful for instructional videos and perhaps I can find a book or two at the library that may help with spear fighting. You'll need to give me a few days to properly compile the information, however." Again, he was thinking out loud, but relaying it to his god.
"Will you be able to handle me being your instructor?"
1/2
2/2
"It would be one thing if I didn't have you... but since you're my shinki, I can't let you down. I have you to worry about now, too. It's not just my own life anymore."
It would take some time... but he'd learn.
no subject
"So you're going to be in for quite a time. Make sure you eat well and get plenty of rest while I do my research"
If Watanuki wanted to learn and use him for godly activities, then he'll be trained like a god.