thenearshore | Closed

Who: Hakkai and Hibari
What: Hakkai feels the need to confront a certain violent shinki about his actions....
When: Backdated to May 3rd
Where: Gojyo's Temple
Warnings: Hibari

Hibari wasn't happy when he left the sakura party, and he certainly wasn't happy later when he'd stashed himself far from his god in Hakkai's new temple. It of course, had to be run by the same asshole who'd pushed him into a duck pond; but he was allowed to stay as long as he didn't actually punch Gojyo in the face.

Or the creepy shinki who kept wandering around, that Hibari had gotten into a tussle a couple times with before he realized how little fight there was to be had and ignored him.

Still creepy.

The best part about staying over though, was the little dragon. Jeep seemed to be getting along with Kishi just fine, and Hibari was more than content to complain about his situation to the creature while petting him and feeding him fish.

He knew he was going to have to deal with the problem of Ren having another shinki eventually, but for right now, without a school to patrol and focus attention on, he was at a loss right here on Hakkai's couch.

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"I've already died once and apparently come back in the same way. Clearly something wants me to stay here. A life isn't worth something if it belongs to someone else."

Hibari's hands reached up towards Jeep, at least trying to coax the dragon off his head so he could finally move his neck without disturbing the creature.

"Do you think so?" Hakkai said, and held out a hand for Jeep to hop to, clicking under his breath. "That's too bad. It'll be quiet around here with you dead."

"Don't give me that pity. I know fully well none of you will care if I'm gone." Hibari gave a loud yawn to show how little he cared, and probably hide something else.

Either way, now that Jeep had crawled onto Hakkai's arm, the shinki was free to lay down again, strangely exhausted from what he'd just done. Kishi was transferred to his chest and the little kitten just kneaded and purred.

Dryly, Hakkai murmured, "I'm afraid you're wrong there." He'd rather not fight Hibari over tossing around words like friend again, but as for none of you would care...

Well, if that was what Hibari preferred to believe, Hakkai doubted he'd be able to talk the boy out of it. He still found himself hoping that Hibari's stubborness, this time, wouldn't literally get him killed.

"I said don't pity me. I know fully well that Ren complains behind my back. This is why you came to talk to me today." He didn't have any hard evidence for this fact because Hibari wasn't the sort of person to spend effort on sneaking around, but it was obvious in the way people acted.

"I'm not speaking for Ren." Hakkai wandered towards the wall, worrying a cracked piece of plaster free with his claw and considering it. Yes, that would need to be patched. "Although, really, if he didn't care about your survival I suspect he would have released you months ago."

Hibari was now using his fingers to wrestle with the kitten on his chest, Kishi having the time of his life batting and chewing at the digits.

"I don't trust him. He'll betray me, despite his 'caring'."

"Why do you think he'll betray you?" Hakkai inquired mildly, worrying another piece of plaster free from the damaged area.

Ren did seem a little manipulative, but only in extremis. Manipulation wasn't the worst of sins, in any case, as far as Hakkai was concerned: certainly not on the same level as betrayal. Was Hibari just refusing to trust any positive emotion?

He picked another piece of plaster free. Hibari was the sort of boy to violently attack over the insult of being referred to as a friend. Perhaps he did believe Ren would betray him because Ren had made the mistake of treating him well.

It was frustrating to answer questions like these when he couldn't remember the reasons. Hibari never really questioned it as much as the other shinki, never having the time or reason, but when he stopped and thought about it, it disturbed him more than he wanted it to.

Especially this one. Why COULDN'T he trust people, why he was so angry at them all the time, why even mentioning the word friend made his insides twist up. Hibari attempted to answer as nonchalantly as possible. "I don't believe him when he says he won't use his power over me. Feelings towards me are all lies."

"Feelings may be lies, but actions are real," Hakkai said, in a thoughtful, academic tone. "You don't have to trust someone's words to trust their actions."

The insecurity lurking under those words was no surprise, although he suspected from the dubious attempt at nonchalance that it might have come as a surprise to Hibari. On the other hand, obsessing over suspicion wasn't useful in the long run.

"Actions can lie too. There is plenty precedent in history where someone does things to put people off guard until they can show thier true colors. I refuse to think that god won't do the same."

I refuse to trust anyone would've been easier to say, but there was no reason to be truthful, even to Hakkai. Even to the one person he felt he trusted and had no idea why.

Hibari might not be saying, I refuse to trust anyone, but it's obvious in his words. So Ren hadn't done or said anything wrong; Hibari simply refused to accept his words and actions as genuine.

Well, at least it was something Hakkai'd be able to use to reassure Ren, he supposes. That still left the problem of what to do about Hibari.

Not abandoning the thoughtful, academic tone, he commented, "You know, if you're without a god, it's possible you'll be assigned one at random by the Heavens."

"Then I'll just bite that one to death until I find one that is worthy. I won't suffer the humiliation of being Nora again. I will choose my own fate," Hibari managed to growl out.

He still couldn't accept the fact he had to be thrall to a god, even if a part of him had grudgingly accepted this fate. It seemed a little bit too much like defeat for his tastes.

But was it better to die than live like this? If he found one against all odds that was a skilled warrior he could respect, would it lessen the sting of being used as an object?

It was these things that kept him up at night. Why did everyone feel against him for thinking like that?

"Good luck," Hakkai said brightly. "Please let me know if you'd like any assistance killing them."

He wasn't going to guarantee he'd attack a stranger for Hibari's sake -- much less a stranger whose only fault was not having the precise type of physical superiority that Hibari respected -- but there were some gods who weren't respectful or considerate towards their shinki. If Hibari got one of that sort, Hakkai had no compunctions about teaching them better manners.

Slowly, the bright cheer ebbed from his face, and he folded his arms. Ren had been shockingly patient. He wasn't sure Hibari'd find anyone who was more so than that. In the meantime... well, Hibari might survive, he supposed. He'd better not get too attached to the idea.

"Is that all you came here to say? If so, leave me alone." Because now Hibari was feeling rather annoyed and tired with the whole state of affairs and just wanted to sleep. It was a good way of not having to think about his problems after all.

Cutting all his ties with his soon-to-be-ex-god could happen later, when Kishi wasn't purring on his chest.

Hakkai considered Hibari for a moment in silence before nodding. "It'll do," he agreed, and turned towards the door. "I don't think I'll change your mind saying anything else, will I?"

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