thenearshore | -Overflow- for 015

[Shun, you walking disaster]

It's a festival. People are having fun and dressing in cute clothes. Lots of people are writing wishes. There's your general idea of the festival.

Not like that - it's Tanabata, obviously I already know that much about it. But focusing on one specific thing for the evening defeats the point of trying to figure out how much of all this I do remember.

[So basically, he'd be more willing to focus on just food if it weren't for the fact that it's been so long since he's been able to do this festival that he's forgotten about ninety percent of it. It also probably says a lot that he assumes finding a favourite food would take the entire evening.]

....Wait, so you don't know much about this either?

[And she thought she was just weird for bullshitting her way through the evening. Nice to see she's not alone.]

[There's a moment there where Shun considers exactly how honestly he should answer that question...but by this point, he figures it can't hurt to at least give Wendy the most general possible hint as to why it's an issue. So with a somewhat reserved fold of the arms, he replies with as blunt a tone as ever.]

It's a major festival, so I've celebrated it before. But that was before the war, so it's been a few of the kinds of years that make you forget that sort of thing.

Oh... I guess that makes sense. Still, you probably know more about it than me.

[All this amnesia.... It's really a bother.]

I'm only here for a short while, so do you want to do some things together?

I'm not sure if it's worse to know nothing about it, or have everything you know about it just out of reach. [It's been a frustrating experience, going around stalls and thinking he recognises something but not quite being able to make the connection.

While he could rebuff Wendy's offer and almost does just on principle, he did tell himself he was going to make an effort tonight. And since both he and Wendy don't really know what they're doing, it's not like he can make much of an idiot of himself not being able to identify things.

So after a moment of consideration, he shrugs.] I don't have anything else to do.

Know nothing about it, probably.

[She doesn't bother to explain much more about it, instead waiting for his own answer and pleasant surprise passing over her face when he accepts. Well, what do you know- an attempt at enjoying himself. She'll take it.]

Alright, then what did you plan on doing before I got here, if you weren't interested in food?

Discovering things for the first time feels like it'd be less frustrating. [And there is definitely a mild strain of that emotion in Shun's tone right now. He's not going to argue that they both probably suck very nearly as badly as each other, anyway.

He seems to have blurred his intent somewhere along the line here, though, so he shakes his head.]

I wasn't uninterested in food, I just wasn't interested in trying to hunt down a specific kind. I didn't have a solid plan because I still don't remember enough of the festival for one, and most of the parts I do are part of the ridiculous romantic myths. [It's very difficult to miss the matter of crossing the bridge, for example.]

And you have an excuse.

[Although that's not really why she thinks it'd be easier, although she can't deny that it'd help.]

[Thinking on his answer, she chews some more on the apple.]

Then... We can just find whatever food that's on a stick and walk around to see what other things to do?

True. [While Shun certainly doesn't sound pleased about the fact, she does have a point. The war still exerts a hold over him, and will probably continue to even long after it ends.

When she mentions food on a stick, Shun considers it briefly, trying to remember what he's passed already that fits that description.]

If you're expecting both of us to eat it, it'll have to be something inoffensive, but I saw a few things like that back there. [He points over his shoulder to a section of stalls nearby. He's pretty sure they at least had takoyaki, which would serve his purposes well enough.]

We don’t both have to eat it, but it’d be easier, huh?

[Still, it’s decided! Since she’s obviously the more social of them, Wendy takes it upon herself to lead, and drops her apple core in a trash can she passes.]

Still, have you been liking any part of this festival so far? Even a little?

Since you were already trying to shove that apple in my face earlier, I assumed that was part of the point. [And it's not like she hasn't made it perfectly clear how she feels about him being as unsociable and set in his habits as he is.

Shun follows along, rather pointedly keeping as much of a distance between himself and the rest of the crowds as he can. Even so, the way his eyes move even more constantly than his usual observational habits is difficult to miss, picking out every figure and movement they come near despite the huge amount of people here.]

I don't know. I was going to figure that out when it was over.

Huh.

[She guesses that's not surprising. While she might rib at him and be visibly exasperated, Wendy has to admit that at least he's careful and thoughtful in his own way. Even for something like this. Settling into the line for the takoyaki, she glances up to him.]

What about things you don't like? Still the same there?

[Shun joins the line a little more reluctantly, still looking over the crowds, but the line is still better than being caught up in the moving people, so he eventually steps forward into it properly.]

Obviously. That's the kind of thing I don't have to think about as much. [Especially since most of his relevant dislikes here were caused by his recent past, rather than being obliterated by it the same way his likes were.] I'm just trying to find something to like about this so the people close to me don't keep distracting themselves with it.

[For a second she just watches him watch other people before she shakes her head.]

Maybe that's your problem, then.

You're going to have to be more specific than that. [Shun's fully aware he has a lot of problems when it comes to this sort of thing. Even only on the basis of what he just said, she could either mean the fact that he's only doing this to satisfy the concerns of people close to him or that it takes him less effort to think about dislikes than likes.]

I mean- [She sweeps her hand through the air.] With that, you're always going to be thinking on if your friends will be satisfied, so you won't actually be focusing on what's happening. Right?

You're doing it backwards, basically.

Not really. I don't think it's going to take much to make them think there's progress. [He has his doubts about how much progress is actually happening, because he still feels just as confused about all this as he was when he started, but he can look like it's happening.

There's a very faint, dry snort before he goes on.] I have to focus to understand this sort of thing again, whether I'm doing it for myself or not.

....You have pretty easy to fool friends, huh?

[It's not as if Shun is a great actor.... Wendy shuffles forward as the line moves on.]

How is that working for you anyway?

Sometimes. [Then again, he only classifies about three people under that banner right now - Ren he doubts is actually fooled, Nanako is six, and Fubuki is Fubuki, but also possibly less convinced than Shun would like him to be. None of them are interested in allowing him to pretend he's fine any other time, after all.] It's easier to fool someone if you're showing them what they want to see.

[Even if the only reason he wants to fool them is because he doesn't think worrying about him is a productive use of their time.]

If you mean understanding again, not as well as I'd like.

["Sometimes".... Well, that's better than all the time, at least. Stepping forward to the front of the line, she grins at the vendor and points out some of the takoyaki. Once that's accomplished and a box is getting ready, she hums thoughtfully.]

[Honestly, she agrees with the part about deception. It's part of how she ended up with such good terms on Hibiki: the god wanted someone cute to gush over her, and Wendy had been fine with playing the role for lack of trouble. However, best not to tell him that.]

But 'not as well' means there's still some stuff you get. What is it?

[That only gets a brief shrug.] Mostly just details. Remembering what certain things are for and why people are doing them, even if I don't understand it myself. Like wishes, or crossing the bridge, but those are about the most well-known traditions of this festival, so I'd have been surprised if I didn't pick back up on the logic quickly.

[If nothing else about them, because he certainly has no plans to actually cross the bridge tonight, even if he's been using it as a touchstone to center himself when the crowds get too overwhelming and he loses his place. The wishes are even more frivolous than that, but he could at least say something he planned to do anyway.]

Oh, that's a good one. We should go do that wish stuff.

[Congrats, Shun, your plans for the night have been decided. Accepting the box of takoyaki, Wendy begins to head off, and holds the box out to him.]

[Shun gives a somewhat noncommittal hum at that, while also taking the hint and picking one of the little sticked takoyaki out of the box.]

Just don't expect anything that frivolous out of me. There's no point wishing for something you can't work towards.

Then wish for something you affect. Obviously.

[Makes sense to her, after all.]

Anyway, sometimes it's not really about wanting something to happen. At least that's what I think.

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